Q) How do you kill a blue elephant? A) Shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a pink elephant? A) Hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun. Q) How do you kill a white elephant? A) Tickle it until it turns pink, hold its trunk until it turns blue, then shoot it with a blue elephant gun.

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I violate everyone that do not thumb me green, and vi0late the children, the parents, and the person of those that thumb me red... Its not about the sex, its about the domination... You might even like it...Your kids? Not so much... Well sometimes... Green thumb me, and I will... Meh, then you are awesome... friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man: Subscribe below, address tracker activated... LETS GO!

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What did the guy say when he found out his girlfriend had a dick I don't think we should date anymore, you have a dick.

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What's the difference between a bag of dead babies and a Ferrari? I have a bag of dead babies in my garage.

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How do you make someone to shut up You tell them to SHUT UP!

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How to you scare a paraplegic? Point a gun at him.

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When life gives you lemons, thank life for its generosity.

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Why Didn't LeBron James go to College? He was really good and decided to go to the NBA straight out of High School.

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Who is green? Mike Wazowsky.

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Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

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An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

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i'm hard

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the next time someone says "yolo" im going to pull out my shotgun and reply "sadly..."

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand. He orders a lemonade and leaves promptly

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Why did the little pig squeal? Because he was going through blades at a slaughter house.

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What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

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Knock knock Who's there Why? Why who? Why so serious?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was being chased by a pack of wolverines and decided the best idea was to run away, and this decision just happened to involve him crossing a road.

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Yo mama is so fat, she eats three times the normal amount of calories one should eat in a single day. This resulted in her early demise, to which you mourned for numerous months before accepting the fact that she was gone.

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Kobe Bryant passing the ball

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Nickelback

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Why did the jew kill himself? He heard a raciest joke and went into a period of depresion causing him to lose all will to live.

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Dude did you hear of that mexcican who made a succesful living? Yeah. Me too,

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Yo momma's so fat, she's broke 'cause she spent too much money on food.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops