A blond, a brunette, and a redhead got into a street fight. who won? The redhead because she had a gun.

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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how many toyota's does it take to pee on a soccer game 900 because isis is a cat vagina

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Q: What's the difference between a black man and a park bench? A: A park bench can support a family of four.

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What's worse than a truck full of dead babies? Trying to sell a used truck with dead baby stains all over it.

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Why did the man talk to the potato? Because hes stupid.

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A:Why did the chicken cross the road? B:To get The Daily.....Do you get it. A:No. B:Me neither..I get The Times.

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*insert joke here*

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A man walks into a music store and hears dubstep playing in the background and he says, "Ugh! I hate dubstep!" Suddenly the clerk gets extremely offended and says, "Haters gonna be gay!" The man chuckles at the clerk's remark and shakes his head. "No no no silly," He said. "Haters gonna not be deaf." He says shaking his head as he walks out. The clerk tries to elaborate on what the man meant, but he realizes he cannot hear his thoughts.

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A black guy and a mexican guy are falling from a building. Which one hits the ground first? Who cares

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Why did the tornado cross the road? Because it's a tornado, that's what tornadoes do.

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Once upon a time there were three aliens. The first alien landed in a school,The second alien landed in a market, and the third alien landed in a preschool. When the first one landed the teacher asked the students who wants to go to the computer lab,all the students said me! me! me! and the alien learned me! me! me! When the second one landed the businessman asked him what he wanted, and he saw a toy gun and it talks and the gun said gun! gun! gun! and the alien learned it and said gun! gun! gun! Then when the third alien landed one preschooler stole another preschoolers lollipop then he said "He stole my lollipop"! And the alien learned it and said "he stole my lollipop!" Then someone got murdered and the three aliens went there and the murderer detective asked "Who killed that man!" And the first alien said me! Me! Me! "What did you kill him with!" Then the second alien said gun! gun! gun! "Why'd you kill him!" Then the third alien said "He stole my lollipop!" And that's it folks! ????????????????????????????????

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How many women are in the world? a little over 3.2 billion because statistics show that there are roughly 51-52% females in the whole population of humans

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Lil Wayne

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A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

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What did the pineapple say to the cucumber? Nothing...the pineapple was incapable of speech, for twas only an infant.

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2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

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How you do stop a baby from swinging around on the clothesline? Hit it with a shovel.

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Whats Do You call people, on the top floor of a Double-Decker bus? Passengers

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Is it closer to Minneapolis, or by bus?

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You: What gets wetter and wetter the more it dries? Person: A towel?! You: No, an aquaphilian woman drying off a car ;)

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What do an airplane and a strawberry have in common? They can both fly.... Except for the strawberry

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whyd the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side :)

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What do you call a black man? A person

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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