What's worse than getting bit by a spider? getting bit by two spiders What's worse than getting bit by two spiders? getting raped What's worse than getting raped? a butterfly landing on you

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He looks it up first to make sure he's got it right before dialing.

2 + 2 = 4

Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

knock knock Who's there? Someone who wants to save you from the shitty dinner your lazy wife made.

What's worse than getting a parking ticket? Getting brutally raped in the anus by the Dark Lord Satan.

Person 1: "Ask me if I'm a rock." Person 2: "Are you a rock?" Person 1: "No."

A white man, a black man, and a mexican are stranded on an island. They all died.

What's the square root of 69 Jimmy? Square root of 69 is 8 something right? Cus I've been trying to work it out oh. Jimmy! It's 8.306623863 >.

Hey guys! Today is September 10th you know what tomorrow means? Party at my house! ...What? It's my birthday.

What do you call a black man that flies a plane? -A pilot

my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

Why did the hamster not eat it's food? Because it wasn't hungry.

A man walks into a bar, he begins drinking and returns home visably drunk. His family disowns him as he is a recovering alchoholic who was three months sober.

Santa Claus is so hairy he need to shave more often.

Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

What did the penguin say to the polar bear? Nothing, penguins haven't evolved a complex form of language.

what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

life is like a penis, short but feels long when it's hard.

What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

Why did the man eat the cheese? because the man was a mouse

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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