Yo mama so fat when she looked at the scale it said to be continued

Whats white, black, and red all over? A penguin on fire

You want to know how I got these scars? A horrible knife throwing accident.

what's red and horny a red unicorn

Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

if it walks like a duck and looks like a duck your probably looking at a goose

Knock knock Who's there No one We are all on the computer

Some people like melon and others like soup.

Why is the duck? Because it has two feet the same.

Do you want to hear a good anti-joke? Well I don't have one.

What did the man say when he saw an orange? That's not a banana.

Knock Knock! Who's there? The mailman! The mailman who? *opens door* Just kidding, I'm actually an axe-murderer!

What is the difference between and Jew and a Boy Scout? The Boy Scout comes back from camp.

Carol never wore her safety goggles. Neither did Hellen Keller.

Where did the people go after the bomb went off? EVERYWHERE!!!

How do you stop a baby from making bad grades? You throw a javelin at its head.

What do a plum and an elephant have in common? They're both gray, except for the plum

The speeding car skidded on the rain-slicked roadway. Beyond the outside of the curve was a 100 meter drop-off. As the car slid toward the edge of the road, the driver and passenger both had a sick feeling in the pit of their stomach and wished they hadn't ordered vinegar milkshakes, the special of the day at Pickle Shack. Or it could have been the toadstools, but it didn't matter now.

An Italian, a Mexican, and an American all stand in one room. The Italian throws pasta out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country." The Mexican throws a taco out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country." The American throws a burger out the window and says "We have too much of this in our country."

Why did the German Constitutional Court issue Decision 2 BvR 1390/12 on September 12, 2012? Because they wanted to refuse the request for a temporary injunction in regards to the European Stability Mechanism!

Whats the difference between a Mexican and a bench? A Mexican is a Mexican and a bench is a bench.

No this is Patrick, I'm not a krusty krab

(SAY KATCHUP AND LICKER AFTER EVERY SENTENCE) FOR BREAKFEAST I HAD (KATCHUP AND LICKER) FOR LUNCH I HAD I SEE MY GIRL FRIEND AT THE MALL SO I (KATCH UP AND LICK HER

A dog walks into a bar. the owner of the bar didn't allow animal in his bar and he helped the dog outside again

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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