Why can't Heller Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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It was at the war and there was a camp site where a doctors helped injured soldiers. One soldier comes in the door and holds his arm. The doctor says "You got shot in the arm?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and holding his shoulder. The doctor says "You got shot in the shoulder?" He says yes. Then another soldier walks in the door and was dragging his left leg across the floor. The doctor says "You got shot in your leg?" The soldier says "No, I stepped on dog shhhttt."

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Whats small yellow and cant swim? A short bus full of autistic children.

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There was a man who entered a local paper's pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping at least one of the puns would win but, unfortunately, no pun in ten won the contest. The man didn't think much of it.

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whats green andthrows forks at you? a blonde painted green in a bush wih a gun and a fly on her eye

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What do you get if you mix a Bulldog and a Shih Tzu? A new breed of dog.

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What's the difference between a pheromone and a hormone? Hormones are secreted internally and trigger various biochemical pathways that cause certain effects. We all are familiar with the effects of testosterone and estrogen, both on the anatomy, and behaviour of humans. Pheromones are secreted externally, and have an effect on another creature in similar ways. Usually they have to do with attracting sexual partners or changing a sex partners behaviour or body in some way.

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what did one wall say to another wall? nothing walls cant talk

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy Wuzzy had cancer.

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what do you call a man with no arms no legs cancer and down syndrome? you call him stephen because his name is stephen

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Why Did The Horse Cross The Road? He Couldn't Because He Was Still-born

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What's worse than getting raped then killed? Getting killed then raped.

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My mother has great posture. She's paralyzed from the neck down.

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Poop

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Knock... Knock... Who's there? AIDS.

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What do you get when you cross a leopard with a camel? Sacked from the zoo.

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what do you call a cat with no tail? smithers.

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What did Santa give little Susie for Christmas? Nothing, he raped her.

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What is fat and ginger? No...Not Garfield...Rebeka Tims

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Xbox One

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Where was little suzie the day after the house fire? At the hospital, being treated for minor burns.

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What did pinocchio want to become? Hepatitus free.

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Hey I just met you you are a sneaker smell my gym socks and then pick oot throughyour nose

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An Irish guy, a black guy, and an Asian guy walk into a bar. They all caught the plague and died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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