Why did a boy fall off the swing at a playground? He did not have any arms.

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I want a lot of likes...do it you wont. i know you wont.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Roses are red violets are blue, I have no pickup line, just Get your tits out

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I was very thirsty so I decided to go get some soda.Upon reaching the soda store I discovered a very long line. I decided to leave the line and instead get some milk, unfortunately once again there was a long line at the milk store. Discouraged by still thirsty I decided to try to luck at the punch store. There was a long line there also.

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what do obama and terrorist have in common -they are both human

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whats black and has 3 legs? a spider with 5 missing legs.duh.

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Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

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Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

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HEY!

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Whats the difference between a woman and a fridge? A fridge doesn't fart when you take your meat out!

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What's funny? A joke. What's funnier than a joke? Two jokes.

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why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

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why did mad is on home s walk becuaes a isnt a number

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why did dinosaurs get extinct? i don't know i was not there to see it!!!!!!!!!

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what is the difference between a car salesman and a lawyer? a car salesman sells cars to people while a lawyer is an expert in law.

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what has 4 legs but can't walk? a paralyzed dog

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Why didn't the girl make the basketball team? She has no arms or legs.

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What did the blue man say to the red lady? Do you want to make purple? -A.M.M

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Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passenger seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

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How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles? Nail its other hand to the floor.

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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Knock, knock! Who's there? Mary Mary who? Mary Smith.

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Dear People who are reading this, I am seriously considering suicide. My Mom beats me and my Dad rapes me in the butthole until i bleed. I have no friends and the only way i get my nut off is if it is into a napkin. I often put peanutbutter on my ballsack and have my dog lick it off. It is the only time that i am happy. I have the gun to my head right now and if you wanna talk me out of it. I live in Lincoln, Nebraska. My number is (402)713-9565. Hurry before i run out of time...... and tears. Sincerely, Adam Claypool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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