Ask Me If I'm A Piece of Bread Are You a Piec--- Nope

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hy-way is-way is-thay oke-jay pelled-say eird-way? ecause-bay its-way in-way IGLATIN-PAY

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? That would depend on the individual situation at hand and to assume you could accurately estimate that is ridiculous.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

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Q: Whats the difference between a baby and a tire swing? A: I don't have a tire swing hanging in my backyard.

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Why does it take women to cum slower than men? Who cares

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Why cant helen keller drive Because shes a woman

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what did sandy say to mr krabs nothing squirles are not smart enough to make a air tank and go under water

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What do you say when you see your tv floating at night? Drop it, nigga!!

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How many morman minutes does it take to get to school? A lightyear

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You and your parents are going to die today

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What do you call a bear with no teeth? A gummy bear!

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

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A man was walking along and got his legs shot off. He then proceeded to calm his wife and children and buy a wheelchair.

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A mosquito flies into a bar and orders a bloody mary, the bartender then takes out a swatter and kills the pest. Noticing the event, the patrons cheer and continued drinking their frothy beverage. Minutes later, the phone rings and the bartender answers the phone. "Hello?" "Hi, I'm looking for a friend of mine, is he there?" "Let me check, by the way, what's his name?" "Jack Hoff" "One sec. HEY FELLAS(yelling over the noisy bar), IS THERE A JACK HOFF HERE? I NEED A JACK HOFF! ANYONE?" Mr. Hoff, sitting at the bar hears this and asks, "who is it?" "He said he's a friend of yours!" "Which one?" " He said his name's Dick Stroker and he needs help on something hardhe'll meet you around back." "Oh ok, thanks."

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Whats worse than having aids...... Being in school

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Why did little Billy fall off his bike? Anwser: because a refridgator hit him.

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Sticks and stones may break my bones.

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 8 had a lot of PCP went crazy and shoved a gun down 6's throat

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A man wearing a chicken t-shirt and holding a pair of dentures walks into the Youtube headquarters, then immediately walks out in fear of getting a copyright strike.

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Why didn't the Hawaiian man know how to surf? He lives in Kansas

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Whats worse than getting stabbed in nuts? A retarded baby that survived the abortion

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Whats the difference between a prostitute and crack dealer? One sells addicting drugs, while the other exploits her vagina for money. Either way, they're both illegal.

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Continents are large islands.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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