Q: What's grey and rocky? A: A grey rocking hair

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What's worse than Jedward? Nothing. They are really and truly awful.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? A vast quantity of things.

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What's green and apple-y? You're gay.

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which sex position produces the ugliest children? go ask ur mom

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Anti-jokes are funny.

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An Irish guy, a black guy, and an Asian guy walk into a bar. They all caught the plague and died.

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A woman buys a man a Valentine's Day present.

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What did Timmy say when the bus crashed? Nothing, it was a horrible crash, he died like everyone else. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Timmy.

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Where's my tractor?

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How do you kill a blonde? Cut off the bloodflow to their vital organs.

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Why was the iPhone screen cracked? Because it was dropped on a rock.

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how did Andrew meet adele He was working as a stableboy

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Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? He was busy

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What happened to your hamster? It died.

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CAUSE IT'S ONE, TWO, THREE STRIKES YOU'RE OUT

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Beans, beans good for the heart, the more you eat the more likely you are to grow into a healthy young man/woman with low risk of heart disease.

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knock knock whos there rock rock who rocks dont knock stupid

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One more note for my children: ...My words appeal to your dark, evil side, it is that which might trigger your fear and disgust... But dont blame your fear on me you moron... ....To those that react with fear and disgust towards my comments: You know the fear and disgust in you, your own emotions make you feel fear and disgust for yourselves, because like all and everything that feels the inspiring words of the Black Angel... ...You know you like it ;) The friendly Black Angel/R*pist: God can free you from the temptation I inspired in your heart, but why would you? Now, thumb this comment down, so you can feel "good about yourself" and suffer in life in order to become a slave and serve the one that made you suffer troughout life... You think me, yet you fail to see that if it where me, I would have be Jehovah your GOD!... ...Worry not though, all of those that plan to stick alive for 10-15 years and I allow to live, will get to serve The Only God, your EMPEROR: Moral Man... Know my name and fear it, and yes mortal, you will also be screaming it...

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I was Born ready I was born naked.

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Q: Waiter! What's this fly doing in my soup? A: Oh, I'm terribly sorry sir, I’ll replace this with a fresh bowl of soup and I’ll have a word with the manager to see if we can deduct a sum from your bill for the inconvenience we have caused you

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What happens to the yellow hat when it is thrown into the red sea? It get's wet.

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Two straight men walk into a gay bar and promptly forget why they went to a gay bar when they are both clearly heterosexual.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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