Two cowboys are in a kitchen. The first one says, "I feel at Home on the range!" To which the second replies, "Is that because of your extensive culinary background?" The first cowboy breaks down in tears because he has never pursued his real dream.

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whats the difference between my mom and your mom nothing they are both sluts

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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A girlfriend told her boyfriend it soaked all the way through. She screwed up their art project.

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How do you seat four gay guys at a bar when there's only one stool? Flip the stool over.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i got 5 Fingers, the middle ones for you ?

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why did your parents die? because I thought it was funny...

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why did the black boy read a book. Because he had a book report due next week

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How many Manatees does it take to screw in a light bulb? One, assuming Manatees have hands.

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A funny joke: Bob was in trouble. He forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE !!" The next morning he got up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife put on her robe and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale. Bob has been missing since Friday.

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What happenes if you put an elephant in the fridge? Nothing, it wouldnt fit.

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Why don't dinosaurs talk anymore? Because they're all dead, duh. :P

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So, a bulldozer rolls into a bar, there is no bar now.

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Q: How many cancer patients does it take to change a lightbulb? A: None, they are too weak to climb the ladder.

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Why should children always be nice? Because the evil christmas demon KRAMPUS will rip their ears off, put them in a bag and beat them with a stick!

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Why did people on a plane die? Because it crashed.

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What starts with F and ends with Uck? F U C K

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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"Want to hear something ironic?" ...he said to the deaf man.

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Seven monkeys jumping on the bed. One fell off and broke its head! Momma called the doctor, And the doctor said, "I'm sorry, Mrs.Monkey, but your son has suffered a severe concussion, and will be very mentally impaired for the rest of his life."

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Why did the boy throw the clock out the window? He was severely depressed.

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A boy walks into a bar. Because he was under-age, security kicked him out as soon as possible and alerted his parents.

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I am white, you are black, we can be friends, racism was abolished.

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Roses are red, and violets are freakin violet. Not blue.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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