Why did the monkey ride a bike? Because he was taken from his natural environment, abused for years and forced to ride a bike.

"Is your fridge running?" "Yes, I believe so" "You'd better go make sure, because I put some chicken in there and it didn't seem very cold to me"

A guy walks into a bar and orders 4 shots. The bartender promptly pulls out a gun and shoots him 4 times.

A horse walks into a bar. The Barman asks "why the long face?" The horse says "My son was recently killed in a horrific horse racing accident"

A guy wanted to write a joke. He didn't.

What is the difference between Barack Obama and Simba from the Lion King? One is a cartoon character from a beloved Disney classic and the other is the current President of the United States of America.

Why did the baker turn off the oven? He had run out of business

Q: What is green, jumps and says i'm a frog? A: A frog that talks

Whats worse than burnt toast? Getting molested

How many times has Susie fallen off the swing? Not enough.

Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it was sick and tired of all the repeated monkey jokes and commited suicide and preceded to fall out of the tree.

A couple is playing chess. The man then chokes his wife to death, throws her body in a woodchopper, and eats her like cereal- Frost

what do you call a guy who makes racist jokes? an insensitive bastard

What did the blind deaf kid get for Christmas? Cancer.

When I was in 4th grade, I was fat. The other kids would take my lunch and spit in all the food, then give it back. Teachers started to wonder why I wasn't eating, and soon began to ask me if I was anorexic. I replied, "do I look anorexic!?" I'm now 6 foot 3 and weigh 56 pounds. *FUN FACT: based on a heartwarming true story.

Knock knock. Who's there? ... Damn knick knockers.

Why is 6 so afraid of 7? Because 7 was a registered six offender.

Why do girls like Justin Beiber? They dont

Knock Knock Who's There? The police- we are sorry to inform you that your wife and only child was killed in a brutal car accident earlier this evening, We offer our condolences.

What happened to the dog who lost its legs? It Died.

roses are red violets are blue I forogt what I was doing where am I?

What was Tyler's last name? Grzesik.

If a bunch of midgets do the wave, is it a ripple ?

rosie o'donald goes on a diet

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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