What did the deaf boy get for Christmas? Something like udgtationdaidnmgf

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So your driving your brick car and the steering wheel falls off. So how many pancakes does it take to fill your dog house? 12 because hamsters don't wear shoes

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Once upon a time, there was a cat. He died.

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It escaped the zoo.

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Why didn't cancer cross the road? Because it was to busy taking my family.

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I hate chocolate. I hate it so much. It sickens me. The only thing I hate more than chocolate is people that like chocolate. I hate them even more. Do you know what happened to the last person I met that liked chocolate? NOTHING

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A man walks into the bar and asks the bartender, "Are you smelling me right now?"

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Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? one dead baby nailed to ten trees

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Why did the man have square fingers? Because he has Apert Syndrome

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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What is the difference between Chuck Norris and a frog one wears pants and the Chuck Norris doesn't.

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Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because she is blind.

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69

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Why did the black man walk into a bar? To order a drink.

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I have this friend named Rachel, so I call her Rachel.

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A: Knock, knock. A: Knock, knock! A: Um ... Knock, knock! B: Sorry, I didn't want to answer the door.

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Hey, I just met you, And this is crazy, But here's my number, So call me anytime you're free, but I can't guarantee I will answer because I could be at work.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being raped by your uncle

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You ever hear that joke about Helen Keller? Neither has she.

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As a kid I was always told that school would get me good places. As an adult, I have found that there is another thing that gets you into a good place. Shrooms.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Who. Who who? "My name ism't really who, it's Thomas. I thought it'd be funny if I made you say who who, as though imitating an owl. However, I understand that childish jokes like that are not funny and if anything stupid and immature. I am sorry for wasting your time. I will go continue my solitary life alone in a crappy tenement... Damn government. They have money to fight wars against foreign countries and yet no money goes to feeding the poor. Do you think life of easy for me loving like this?! I'm such a lost cause not even my own parents want to see me! And I'll be damned if they're still alive. A dad who beat me and got drunk even night, and a mom with breast cancer"(Thomas, overwhelmed, proceeds to have a mental breakdown). The man at the door comes out to comfort him. "It's alright man. i'll help you out." He let's Jeffrey stay with him for the next four months. They both get raped by a T-Rex.

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You know what assuming leads to... .....Assumptions.

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women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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