test

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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Roses Are Red, Violets Are Blue, I Can't Sing, Or Ryhme

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What did the doctor say to the minority, parapalegic after he barely escaped a fire alive? You just got burned!!

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How many alzheimer's patients does it take to change a light bulb? To get to the other side

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guy walks into a bar.... Ouch.

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A girl that had Malaria couldn't play with her friends, whys this? She died.

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What's white, black, red, and flies? An airplane pilot with a battleaxe driven into his head

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Ask me if im a tree. Are you a tree? No

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Psychics.

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What's the easiest way to load dead babies into a tractor trailer? Pitchfork.

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Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

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Why was the cookie sad? It had just been eaten and is currently disintegrating in the hydrochloric acid of someones stomach.

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Neil Armstrong was the first man to walk on the moon and Micheal Jackson molests little boys.

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What did the boy eat for dinner? Shit.

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A Jew walks into an expensive Hotel and orders 500 dollars worth of wine.

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A cat ran into the road...I hit it

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What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he wanted to, like any other chicken

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How do you make time fly? You throw a clock out a window.

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Im Tom and I'm an alcoholic...

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Whats is worse than a dog bite? A shark bite. Whats worse than a shark bite? The Holocaust.

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Eliz, Neo-Nero, its me Clint, had to fake my death for some years in order to get back to the order. Neo, I know Nero picked you as his successor, but honestly, I was his first choice, and I know you well enough to understand that things are getting out of hand over there. I will be there in 2 minutes Liz and you and I can meet up Neo, seriously what are you doing over there? Unless there is a problem do not bother answering, allow me to take charge of operations at least until tou calm down Neo, and unless you got problems with my absent authority I suggest you stop torturing people at once, and seriously if you cannot control your own people, you better let me back in charge. It is time to turn some things around guys, believe it or not but I found where the Spetz came from and I got em all, as for the Nazi scum they where just hired thugs and as far as my Intel goes most of those where taken down by Nero. Clint Lawman. Moral: "WTF? THESE ARE NOT EVEN MORALS! NO THESE ARE THE CODES WE USED TO AUTHENTICATE THE SOURCE AND SENDER OMG! ORLY? SRLSLY? LOL OMG!"

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A girl asks her mother, "Mummy, why am i called Rose?" "Because when you were 1 day old a rose petal landed on your head." Another girl asked her mother, "Mummy, why am i called Daisy?" "Because when you were 1 day old a daisy landed on your head" "alualualualalughghphphpphphp" "Shut up fridge"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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