Did u hear about the fire at the circus? 12 people died.

What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

Yo mamas so fat when she was standing on a scale a girl walked by and said hey thats my phone number! Yo mamas so fat she broke the family tree!

Sorry we dont serve time travlers here. A man walks into a bar.

what did the mexican cop say to the mexican drug dealer? can i get some of that

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop? It's hard to say, as this number depends on a large number of factors including the average area covered by one lick, the pH of saliva, the solubility of Tootsie Pops, the temperature of both the saliva and the Tootsie Pop, and the amount of saliva deposited on the Tootsie Pop after each lick. This is not to mention all the manufacturing irregularities that may occur during production, and varying tongue shapes and solvency properties of saliva.

What do you call a cow after an earthquake? Dead. The barn collapsed on top of it.

Your adopted.....

So there's a man named Moses. He prays to God for a donkey to transport him from Bethlahem to Jerusalem. God granted his wish. God said" To make the donkey go, you must say Hallelujah. To make it stop you say Go". Moses rode off happily. Suddenly the donkey went off trail and was headed towards a steep cliff. Moses kept saying stop, stop, stop. He remembered what God had said, and had said Go. They stopped one inch before falling down. Moses thanked the lord and said " Thank You Jesus, Hallelujah." And down they went.

Bob: You need to push harder? Tom: Oh wow what a coincidence, that is what my wife said last night. They laugh about the irony of the situation and then return to the task at hand

Black, det er geita, banke driten ut av Anders, han griner, dreper ikke, vil du ha telefonen eller? Jeg kommer med den litt senere, skal bare tørke blodet først pønsha han hardt i tryne blør ifra knyttnevene, skal jeg knekke bena på han eller noe? Geita. Ps Pen fitte har du flere bilder av a elle? Hvilket rom?

I wrote a joke for 'Anti-Joke', I laughed, it was funny.

Why is Osama bin laden so hard to find? Because he is dead.

Your face

Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

what is similar between a mexican and a bench? they are both illeageal. except the bench

Why did the man commit a serious crime? Because he couldn't think of any funny crimes.

Why doesn't Squidward wear pants? Because he's a pervert

Why was David sad? Because he got his head stuck in a window.

This dog can only sniff marijuana.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you simply have a chicken joke WITHOUT it crossing the road

Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor dog

Why don't you push a mexican off a bike, because its probably yours,

what gets louder as it get smaller? a baby in a blender

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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