- Anti Joke

Arnold Schwarzenegger at Terminator: Gaynysis (or whatever I wont bother checking that out) YA NEED TO REMUV THE QUANTANAMO TRANSLACATOR TO RELOCALIZAYSEE THE INTERDEEMENENTIONAL MAYTREX! Yes, Pops but what about the time travel Paradox? YOU NEEED TO REMOV THE CRISTAL PALARDOXAL WARCALIBREITOR IN ORDA TO DESINSTONYSE THE DEEMENTIAL CORDALOXEY! Me: Leaving the cinema Moral: If you thought the trailer was like "meh", then you will soon realize it was the best part off the movie... The only part that is meh, and while I can honestly say I dont understand shit about how timelines work in Terminator (The creators dont do it either) Having Arnold Fucking Swartsnigger go with the Geek lingo DID ABSOLUTELY NOTHING! To explain things to me, NOTHIIIIING!

Why did it take a long time to read the anti-joke? Because of the great amount of space between the question and the answer.

why did suzy fall off the swing? she has no arms, knock knock who's there? Not suzy!

Yo mama's so fat she has diabetes.

How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

What is a black man's favorite food? It differs from person to person.

What did the T-Rex say to the caveman? Nothing. Tyrannosaurus Rex was a prehistoric land animal that roamed the Earth roughly 65 million years before the appearance of man. Making such a conversation impossible.

what the **** is wrong with kieran scotts forhead!

A kangaroo walks into a bar, he hops up to the bartender, and asks for a martini. The bartender, not knowing exactly what to do, goes into the back to his boss's office. He says "Hey, there's a kangaroo up front askin' for a martini...do we serve kangaroos?" His boss replies "Ya, of course, but these kangaroos, they aren't too smart, so charge him like 50 bucks for the drink." The bartender agrees and goes back up front to serve the kangaroo. He pours the martini and hands it to the kangaroo, the kangaroo thanks him and says "How much do I owe you?" The bartender replies "50 bucks." The kangaroo then reaches into his pouch, pulls out a fifty dollar bill, and puts it on the counter. He finishes his drink and begins to hop away. As he is leaving, the bartender says "Hey, wait, we don't get many of your kind around here, why is that?" And the kangaroo replies "I'm not surprised at THESE prices!!!" and hops out.

i eat poop and i dont care what you think 11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111tu9jhrengbae9u-8w0bfduirjwpjawqdtrse75adrc6tvfgyuhijkoplkij9uhn8yb7gtv6rc5ex45cr6fvt7gby8nhu9jmi0ok,m0inub8ytvcrexzwxecdrf6tvg7by8nu9im,opolpmiun8bytvrc534xwz24frv56tb7ny8u9m8,o0m9.by78tvr56ccv6tby7n8/0munby78t6vr5c 11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111tu9jhrengbae9u-8w0bfduirjwpjawqdtrse75adrc6tvfgyuhijkoplkij9uhn8yb7gtv6rc5ex45cr6fvt7gby8nhu9jmi0ok,m0inub8ytvcrexzwxecdrf6tvg7by8nu9im,opolpmiun8bytvrc534xwz24frv56tb7ny8u9m8,o0m9.by78tvr56ccv6tby7n8/0munby78t6vr5c 11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111tu9jhrengbae9u-8w0bfduirjwpjawqdtrse75adrc6tvfgyuhijkoplkij9uhn8yb7gtv6rc5ex45cr6fvt7gby8nhu9jmi0ok,m0inub8ytvcrexzwxecdrf6tvg7by8nu9im,opolpmiun8bytvrc534xwz24frv56tb7ny8u9m8,o0m9.by78tvr56ccv6tby7n8/0munby78t6vr5c 11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111tu9jhrengbae9u-8w0bfduirjwpjawqdtrse75adrc6tvfgyuhijkoplkij9uhn8yb7gtv6rc5ex45cr6fvt7gby8nhu9jmi0ok,m0inub8ytvcrexzwxecdrf6tvg7by8nu9im,opolpmiun8bytvrc534xwz24frv56tb7ny8u9m8,o0m9.by78tvr56ccv6tby7n8/0munby78t6vr5c 11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111tu9jhrengbae9u-8w0bfduirjwpjawqdtrse75adrc6tvfgyuhijkoplkij9uhn8yb7gtv6rc5ex45cr6fvt7gby8nhu9jmi0ok,m0inub8ytvcrexzwxecdrf6tvg7by8nu9im,opolpmiun8bytvrc534xwz24frv56tb7ny8u9m8,o0m9.by78tvr56ccv6tby7n8/0munby78t6vr5c 11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111tu9jhrengbae9u-8w0bfduirjwpjawqdtrse75adrc6tvfgyuhijkoplkij9uhn8yb7gtv6rc5ex45cr6fvt7gby8nhu9jmi0ok,m0inub8ytvcrexzwxecdrf6tvg7by8nu9im,opolpmiun8bytvrc534xwz24frv56tb7ny8u9m8,o0m9.by78tvr56ccv6tby7n8/0munby78t6vr5c 11111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111111tu9jhrengbae9u-8w0bfduirjwpjawqdtrse75adrc6tvfgyuhijkoplkij9uhn8yb7gtv6rc5ex45cr6fvt7gby8nhu9jmi0ok,m0inub8ytvcrexzwxecdrf6tvg7by8nu9im,opolpmiun8bytvrc534xwz24frv56tb7ny8u9m8,o0m9.by78tvr56ccv6tby7n8/0munby78t6vr5c

A man with Tourette's syndrome walks into a bar. Because of his disease, he shouts unexpected profanities across the room, and everybody in the bar bursts into laughter. The man cannot handle the humiliation anymore and goes home. He opens a drawer in his bedroom, pulls out a gun, and points it at his head. His wife walks in on him about to commit suicide. She is horrified. He then looks at her and then down, and he notices his one and only daughter by the age of 7 is by her side. The man ponders his reckless decision he was about to make. Moments later he and his family are holding one another sobbing in each others arms. A few days later the man goes back to the bar and shoots everybody there. Shocked and afraid, he curled up into a ball and regretted his decision. An hour later the police arrived and he was sentenced to life in prison for 3rd degree murder. His wife moved on and started a new family with his former best friend, and his daughter vists him every first tuesday of every other month. The man still suffers from Tourette's and cannot control his ticks and rots in jail. He continues to scream random obscenities for the rest of his life with no parole.

What's for dinner? Flesh from when your brother was alive and your blood.

man 1 walks by man 2 man 1 says hey buddy whats up man 2 responds do i know you man 1 says no but i saw you seeing a movie on friday man 2 says oh cool but wasnt that movie great man 1 responds ya and man 1 and man 2 become best friends plus man 1 only liked man 2 because he was rich!!!

Why was the boy sad? Because his dad was a serious alcoholic who refused to go to rehab. Being an alcoholic constantly led to him beating the boy and his mother. Eventually, the boy couldn't handle this anymore, and he committed suicide. Realizing what he had done, the father also committed suicide. The mother is now locked away in a mental hospital, for she couldn't hold grasp of the deaths of her husband, and her son.

Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

Why was the black man so good at basketball? Because he practiced.

Why was the middle-aged doctor morbidly obese? He liked bacon and was severely hypocritical.

Q: What happens when you throw a glowing purple rock into a bright green stream? A: It makes a splash

why did michele jackson rape a kid. because he was horny duhhhh!

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

hey girl, My Gyarados is BIG enough for you to ride it ALL day and night

Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? Yes.

What's bigger than a breadbox? Whitney Houston's coffin.

What's the best thing about shrimp? It never goes bad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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