long in the tooth!

What's black, white, and red all over? An interracial couple that got hit by a bus.

Q: Why wouldn't the other kids play with Timmy at recess? A: Because he was a burn victim and had no face.

If you were a booger..................... I would get a tissue so i could blow my nose.

What did the guy who dropped his iPhone do? He went out and bought a knew one.

What Do You Call a Hawk in Virginia? A Hawk What Do you Call a Hawk that lives in Virginia? Virgian Hawk

whats the difference between jimmy saville and a horse? jimmy has a bigger cock

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Biting into a worm and finding an apple

Whats the difference between obama and Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson Is dead

Mitt Romney

You know what makes me smile? Face muscles

What weights more than a 300 pound man? A 400 pound man.

What happens when you bite the head off of two animal crackers and make them play leap frog? Nothing. Quit playing with your food.

What did the statue say to the other statue? Nothing, statues cant speak.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a pressure-sensitive explosive device.

Why did little timmy cry? He was nailed to a ceiling fan.

What do you call a kid with no arms, no legs, and an eyepatch? Names.

everybody loves raymond

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, well at least they were, until I met you!

what did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? Were both lawyers!

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

What do you call a black man stealing your tv? A thief

What do you call a discounted watercraft? It is traditional to give it a female name.

Knock Knock. Who's there? An Alzheimers's patient. An Alzheimers's patient who? To get to the other side!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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