My wife made me a sandwich

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Think of a fruit that isn't an orange ... You're thought of a pear, didn't you?

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wommmoaooammaaa

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A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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What did the sheep say to the Commonwealth Committee on September 11 2001? Baabaaabaaaahhh

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whats worse than one week in school? two weeks in school. whats worse than two weeks in school? three weeks in school whats worse than three weeks in school? child abuse, killing animals and murder

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What did the cop say to the man arrested for speeding? You were going over the speed limit sir, I'm going to have to give you a ticket for that.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Lamborghini? I don't have a Lamborghini in my garage..

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What'd the black woman say when she met her husband's white mistress? Hello, nice to meet you.

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whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

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Do you know who's gay? Homosexuals.

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Yo Mama is so white, people call her caucasian.

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Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

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a woman leaves the kitchen.......

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how many licks does it take to get too the tootsie center of a tootsie pop. Well it depends on how you eat it, there is always the option of biting it, so there is no defined answer, as well as ones lick might absorb more of the lollipop then another mans.

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Whats the difference between a blonde and a sloth? Everything. The blonde is a human being and humans are way different than sloths.

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Whats worse than losing your car keys? Watching your 4 year old son get visciously raped by a 20stone sex hungry pedophile and knowing you cant do anything about it because the sex hungry pedophile is your dad and he is the alpha male of the family so he has full mating rights.

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I need to start studying.

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A horse, an apple, a leprechaun and a black man walk into a bar. They sit down and order drinks. The bartender looks at them and say "what is this, a joke?"

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An Asian walks into a bar. He has a few drinks, but makes sure not to have to many. He then drives home safely, and enjoys a good nights rest.

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how does stephen hawking get an erection? he turns off his pop-up blocker

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I'm Jewish

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knock knock whos there boo boo who why are you sad my wife has cancer

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Last week, I visited the Virgin Islands. Now it's just called Islands.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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