why did the little girl drown? because she was left unsupervized and had never properly learned to swim. she also had no arms and cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Dude did you hear of that mexcican who made a succesful living? Yeah. Me too,

thumb_up thumb_down +10

What do you call a polar bear in the desert? Bobby Marksson.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did Bob throw butter out the window, Because he is mentally retarded.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

A obese woman, a anorexic woman and a average weight woman sit down to eat. They all have a good time.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

... i forgot the joke :p

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the girl drop out of school? She was being sexually assaulted by her mothers alcoholic boyfriend and was having trouble coping.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Whats hard and long? An erect penile shaft.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

why do i love my iphone because its a very versatile electronic device with many uses and i can get the anti-joke app

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Isn't everyday "black tie optional"?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock, knock. Who is there? Child services, here to take your children. The following day, there is another knock at the door. Who is there? The police. The woman runs into the kitchen and kills herself.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Every time you log on to a porn site, somewhere a panda cub explodes. BOYCOTT PORNOGRAPHY. SAVE THE PANDAS.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

what is a bracket? a bracket

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why couldnt the boy hang out with his friend? because when he called his friend to ask him to hang out he had badd cel phone service. so he went to the other room to call him on his landline but unfortunately his parents have had a rough month at work and therfore could not pay the bill and having there phone lines cut off. this left his only option to mail him a letter asking if he wanted to hang out. he spent about 4 hours writing the 10 page letter asking his friend if he wanted to hang out. when he was finished writing the letter, he went to the drwer to find an envelope and a stamp. unfortunately no envelopes or stamps could be found. so the boy had to walk down town to the post office to pick some up. he had to walk bc since his parents have been having a rough time at work, theyve been working extra hours to help put food on the table and give their son the educaion he needs to become succesful in his life. wen he gets back from the post office with the supplies he needed to mail the letter, he put it in the mail box and put the flag up. but the mail had alreeady come that day so he had to wait tilll monday for the letter to be deliverd since tommorow was sunday and everyone knows that the mail does not come on mondays. when the mail came, the mailman took the letter and eventually deliverd it. he knew it was deliverd bc he traveld online but since there was no internet connection because of his parents failing to pay the bill, he had to go to the library to use the computer. the boy waited a week but his friend never wrote back. so his only other option to find out if his friend wanted to hang out was to simply walk over to his house and ask him in person. since the boy was a little impatient and hess been waiting several day for an answer, he decided to run over instead of walk. as he was approaching his friends house, instead of walking all the way around the road to walk on the cross walk he figured it would take alot less time to just cross the road right then and there. as he stepped onto the road a huge bus sped right by him, almost hitting him. this startled the boy. the boy walked up to his friends door, knocked, and the boy answerd. he asked if he wanted to hang out and his friends said no, pushed him into the street, and the boy was hit by a drunk driver. the boy was rushed to the hospital where they barely just saved his life. although his life was saved he was forced to live on life suppport for the rest of his life. 3 months into being on life support, the same friend came to visit him in the hospital. his friend says, u wanna no why i didnt wanna hang out with you? and the boy said yes. so his friend says "well...." the friend then pull the plug on the boys life support and the boy dies

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Hello everyone, if you couldnt tell, the most popular joke was removed because it wasnt even an antijoke, if you have a joke that isnt an antijoke, post it somewhere else, if you dont know what an antijoke even is then get the f*ck out, thumbs up if you agree with me

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's the difference between Donald Trump and a refrigerator? Open a refrigerator and you will find food, typically refrigerated food like milk, eggs, you know, stuff like that.... When you open Donald Trump you will be charged with murder.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the mexican say to the black guy before he went to work. Hey

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: Why was the black man good at basketball? A: because he practiced

thumb_up thumb_down +8

if your paddling a backwards canoe up a waterfall and it loses its wheel, how many pancakes does it take to fill a dog house? the answer is 17 because aliens are allgeric to cows and mustard.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the street? He wanted to make breakfast

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What did the Zen Buddhist say in the hamburger store? He said, "Make me one with everything."

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the quick brown fox jump in the lake? He did not see lake on the other side of the lazy dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the boy named Bethel? He had horrible parents that wanted him to live a life of social poverty.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops