How do you kill a fish? You bite off its head.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Beacuse she has no arms or legs. Knock knock. Who's There? Not Sally.

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Do you want to hear a racist joke? I hate black people...

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Why did the other reindeer make fun of Rudolph? He had one nut

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What did the paper say to the pen? Nothing, they are inanimate objects!

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A rock walks into a bar. The town goes into extreme panic and is abandoned because rocks are inanimate objects.

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What did the black man do when his car was rear-ended? He exchanged insurance information with the other driver.

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Life

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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My tractor broke down.

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I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

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Why did the mexican mow the lawn. Because the grass in his front yard is longer than he likes it .

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You know whats better than 24? 25

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What is big, eats cats, smells good, but looks like shit? A big, cat eating, good smelling piece of shit

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What's the biggest lie you've ever told? "I have read and agree to the Terms of Service"

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what is brown and wet? Muddy water

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Why didn't the boy eat his food? because he wasn't hungry.

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Why didn't the family finish their picnic? Because a dog was sick all over the food.

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your mom is so fat, she stepped on the scale and said, "I really need to eat better and I'm thinking about getting a gym membership." She did so, and she lost so much weight that all her friends congratulated her everywhere she went, and some didn't even recognize her.

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Your mom is so hairy... it doesn't even seem like she underwent chemotherapy for her breast cancer a few months ago.

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What did the pet lion say to its owner? Nothing. Lions do not have the ability to speak. The lion then proceeded to hunt down its owner, pin him down and rip out his insides. Besides, the likelyhood of owning a lion as a pet is very slim, and even if one did, this act would be highly illegal in most parts of the world.

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Black...

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What did the dog say to the cat? Nothing, his mouth was full of it's intestines.

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Why did 9/11 take place? Because God hates Satan

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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