Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

*knock knock* "Who's there?" "It's the police, I'm afraid your husband was in a car crash and died."

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead are all on a deserted island with no food or water. The redhead decides to try and swim to safety, but after a few hours of swimming she becomes to tired to carry on and drowns. After knowing their friend died, the two other women decide that swimming is not a viable option for rescue, so they decide to stay on the island. A few days later a search party rescues them.

What did the red cat say to his owner? Nothing.

A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

Why'd the girl drop her lollipop? She got hit by a bus.

What happens when you give someone a free chocolate bar? ThEeyroast it and vapourise it intheir hands....no they eat it

What did the jacket say to the girl? Zip me up wait why am I talking

Yo momma so fat she when god said let there be let he said get the fuck out the way!

Doctor Doctor i've got wind can you give me something? Thats not wind the doctor replies thats a rare form of stomach cancer.

A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding two worms in your apple. and being an orphan.

Why couldn't the Asian man drive very well? He was blind from birth.

What's worse than 9/11? a dipped glass of milk

What color do you get when you mix blue and red? Purple.

Nicki Minaj walks into a bar... there's no punchline because ruining music isn't funny.

What did Osama Bin Laden say before was captured? nothing the U.S. military slit his throat on site

Where is one place everyone eventually goes to rest? A cemetery.

Why did the Polish man cross the road? Because the doctors was across the road, and he had a doctor appointment in five minutes time.

how come timmy didnt brush his teeth he didnt have a toothbrush

Why did the chicken cross the road? I have no idea but I don't see why it would want to cross a road in the first place. It is a chicken.

What is the difference between the number 20 and 21 1

What would you do for a Klondike Bar? I would probably spend somewhere under 3 dollars at a store, but only if somebody else drives me. I really don't want to drive, not in this gas shortage. You know what...forget it, Klondike Bars make my teeth hurt due to my sensitive teeth problem. I know I should get that sensitive teeth tooth paste, but I always forget when at the store.

Why didn't the black man eat a packet of crisps? Because he didn't have any.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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