Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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Today is March 22.

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What did King Tut say when he got scared? How would I know? It was over a thousand years ago.

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Two children are opening presents for Christmas. Daughter: "Look how many beautiful things I've got, look how much parents love me! And you got a Jo-Jo! Ha-ha!" Son*playing with Jo-Jo*: "Yeah, some of us have Jo-Jo, and some of us leuchemia. Ha-ha."

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Mario goes home after a hard day of work and finds his entire family killed and a note from Bowser... He is now an asshole who beats and rapes kids...

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Most people like to drink beer, others do not.

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How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

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Q:Why did the bunny run up the hill? A:Because he can't run under it.

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Me: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? You: No. Me: Neither have they.

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Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

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"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Interrupting kid with ADHD" *I did not respond, as I knew he would interrupt me before I was able to finish the sentence.*

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How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

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Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

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What happened to the soldier who go shot while fighting terrorists in the middle east? He died and had a proper funeral back in the town/city that he was born in.

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Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board.

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An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a gin and tonic. The bartender gives him a sprite and charges him $12.

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Whats cooler than being cool in High School? Nothing, now take a hit...everyone's looking

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what did binladin say when he got to hell? oh no. im in hell

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How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

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yo mamas so fat that when she wears a bathing suit people go "wow, that women is fat"

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Did you hear about the guy who broke his legs? His legs were broke.

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"Oren" Tifa is not around here, besides she does not like you anymore, get lost you wacko!

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what do you call white people running down a mountain? Avalanche What do you call black people running down a mountain? Jailbreak

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My dad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops