Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Two children are opening presents for Christmas. Daughter: "Look how many beautiful things I've got, look how much parents love me! And you got a Jo-Jo! Ha-ha!" Son*playing with Jo-Jo*: "Yeah, some of us have Jo-Jo, and some of us leuchemia. Ha-ha."

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did King Tut say when he got scared? How would I know? It was over a thousand years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Today is March 22.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many licks does it take to get to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? As many as it takes.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Mario goes home after a hard day of work and finds his entire family killed and a note from Bowser... He is now an asshole who beats and rapes kids...

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Pee is yellow Shit is? brown My shit is yellow WTF

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How do you confuse a blond? Dress up as Lady Gaga and yell "Ni!" in her face.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

"Knock Knock" "Whos there?" "Interrupting kid with ADHD" *I did not respond, as I knew he would interrupt me before I was able to finish the sentence.*

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Most people like to drink beer, others do not.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Susie had no arms and no legs.. what did she get for Christmas? Cancer. Amy was riding on a swing.. who was pushing her? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Me: Have you ever eaten Ethiopian food? You: No. Me: Neither have they.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Q:Why did the bunny run up the hill? A:Because he can't run under it.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What happened to the soldier who go shot while fighting terrorists in the middle east? He died and had a proper funeral back in the town/city that he was born in.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what did binladin say when he got to hell? oh no. im in hell

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Well, I guess it's back to the drawing board.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

How many friends does it take to catch an owl? One because he was a bird catcher.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

An Irishman walks into a bar and orders a gin and tonic. The bartender gives him a sprite and charges him $12.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

yo mamas so fat that when she wears a bathing suit people go "wow, that women is fat"

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats cooler than being cool in High School? Nothing, now take a hit...everyone's looking

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Question what is blue and floats Answer everything that is blue that foes not sink

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Why is the black guy afraid of the white guy? He's not, it's the other way around.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

My dad

thumb_up thumb_down -12

what do you call white people running down a mountain? Avalanche What do you call black people running down a mountain? Jailbreak

thumb_up thumb_down -12

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops