Your momma's so fat that she is at risk for heart disease and diabetes.

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Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

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Why was the jewish boy sad? He had no friends.

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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How many fat Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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What do you call a muslim in an airplane? Whatever his name may be, though you could, of course, choose not to address him, though if it were a two-seater plane, it would be good manners to exchange polite conversation.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

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What did the boy reading the book do? He kept turning pages and reading until he came to the end, closed the book, and put it back onto the book shelf.

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A baby seal walks into a club.

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What do you call a baby in a blender? Child abuse.

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Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Look through your peephole, you lazy bastard.

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What did the ant say when he walked in the club. . . Nothing he was immediately stepped on.

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Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

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What did the black man say about Linkin Park? That there's obviously a rapist in their midst and they should all be questioned.

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A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

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Q: A boy went to 7-11 and bought Coke instead of 7up. Why? A: I don't know

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Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Bailiffs.

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What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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