why did spiderman fall off the roof ? cause it was wet

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Im going to the patriots jets game this year..... When the kick a feild goal and you see two kids wearing lime green holding up a poster that says BRADY LIKES SAGGY BALLS that will be me and my friend -RT

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So a platypus walks into a bar. He orders a drink and then goes home drunk. His wife doesn't approve of his drinking, so she took her children then left. The lonely platypus wandered around for days on end in the lonely silence. He realized he wanted a job, but he couldn't get one, and i lied. it wasnt a platypus. it never even haooened i wasted your time.

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A woman fell victim to nasty car accident. Her injuries were very grave. The doctors warned her family that she had two hours to live. She died two hours later.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing, shit went down so bad.

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What did the muffin say to the cup cake? nothing, muffins can't talk, and cup cakes can't hear.

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Why did the leaf fall of the tree? Because it was fall

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Jim: You know whats funny? Bob: What? Jim: The 28th Amendment.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead

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What did the fat black man do? Get a gym membership.

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Did you here about the guy who got his right leg and right arm cut off? I made him up but he would make one good anti-joke.

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* Are you deaf? * Yes, as I love paradoxes.

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Why was the girl running out of the school? Because her principal was trying to rape her.

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-What's the difference between Michael Phelps and Hitler? Michael Phelps can finish a race.

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Your mother is so stupid because as a child, she was unable to keep up with what was being taught as she unfortunately had a learning disability.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have a gun And you don't,

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Mam: Wanna hear a joke about my penis?... nevermind, it's to long. Woman: wanna hear a joke about my vagina?... nevermind, u wouldn't get it.

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A boy orders a sandwich at a restaurant. He then questions the cashier about it. Boy: Excuse me, Why is my sandwich so bad? Cashier: Sorry, none of our women cooks were in today.

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Yo momma's so fat, she's most likely to be at risk of high cholesterol and should probably get herself tested at her nearest health clinic.

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What's red and smells like blood? Blood.

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What happens when you shoot a giraffe? It dies.

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What's up? The sky. What's down? Your mom: she was stabbed

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What did the Nazi say to the farmer? Sie sind Juden versteckt

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Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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