teacher: what do you call a math book with no writing in it?! student: idk what? teacher: a notebook! student: ok... thanks

what do you call a man with no @ss? d1ckhead

Never bring a knife to a sword fight Bring A GIANT FREAKING HIPPOPOTAMUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Where can you find a good lawyer? At a reputable law firm.

A bear and a rabbit are walking i n the woods until they spot a magic genie. The bear mauls the rabbit because it is the rabbit's natural predator and is indifferent to the genie because it has no prior education on persian mythology.

If life gives you lemons, steal the declaration of independance and use the lemons and a hair dryer to reveal the numbers on the back. Then enbark on an epic journey that ends with the discovery of the templars treasure. Lastly, use the money you earned to buy some lemons and make some lemonade.

Where do you send a Jew with ADD? A concentration camp.

Vicky is my best friend.

Why couldn't the black man swim? Both of his legs were just eaten by a shark.

Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

Why was the Jamaican man smoking pot? His doctor prescribed it. The man has a serious case of glaucoma.

What's worse than biting into a worm and finding an apple? Why would you bite into a worm?

Yo mama is so poor I saw her kicking a can down the street and asked her what she was doing? Her reply was: Kicking a can down the street. What did you think she was doing? Moving?

What's brown and sticky? A stick

This is an anti joke

What do you call the man who graduated medical school last in his class? Doctor

Why did the 100 year old man die? He was really old and his heart stopped beating after his BLT.

Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

Why didn't the teen girl get to her appointment? A) She woke up late.

Whats 2+1? 2.

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's white and sticky? A stick painted white.

how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

why did the chicken cross the road? who cares its a chicken.

What animal has four legs and one hand? Happy rottweiler

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...