How are a dead chicken and a woman alike? They both belong in the kitchen

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Q: Why is eminem such a good rapper? A: well if you want to know its becuase he had a bad childhood experience and and needed some money so he put hard work and dedication into rapping.

Q) What did one chicken say to the other? A) Nothing. Chickens can't talk.

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

Q: What did the ant say to the bush? A: Ernest Borgnine

What? Chicken butt Why? Chicken thigh Who? Deez nuts

What do a watermelon and a bunny have in common? they are both green except the bunny

A man walked into a bar, He then realised that he was likely to become the butt of a joke quite soon and subsequently left to take his kids to the park.

Q. Whats long and and can drip out fluids? a tap.

this is a haiku i have no idea where i am going with .... this

why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

What is worse the the Holocaust? Nothing

roses are read, violets are blue. i have alzheimers and Jill came tumbling down.

There once was an X from place B, Who satisfied predicate P, Then X did thing A, In a specified way, Resulting in circumstance C.

Your'e probably not going to laugh at this joke, it wasn't made to be funny

Q:Why did the old man die? A:Because he had Cancer in his hole body.

Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

I will create more jobs for americans

Why isn't eating an Olympic sport? Because that wouldn't make any sense.

How did little Jimmy survive the 20 story fall? He couldn't he died from the last fall, aren't you paying attention?

Man walks into a bar, Has a few drinks and goes home.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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