A black man with a blond beard came to deliver me a pizza. I paid him, tipped him, and closed my door. I forgot the pizza. Dammit.

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Once there was a dog, another one came to it and then there were two.

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A teacher, a consturction worker, and an army general are on an airplane. The pilot tells them the plane has too much weight, and if they don't each drop one item then the plane will crash. Realizing one item each is obviously not enough weight to throw off, the teacher and the construction worker team up and throw the army genral off the plane. They land safely, and live the rest of their life haunted by their vile actions.

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Q. why did I get hurt A. My pants fell off

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Why did the 14 year old girl have sex? Because she's in love with her boyfriend and that's how she expresses it.

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You wanna see something really scary?

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A white man and a black man were walking down the street. The black borrowed the white man's phone to make a quick call when an incoming call came in. The black man, while trying to hand the phone back, says, "Here, it's your Dad." The white man replies, "No, that's my phone." Amazed at how uneducated the black man was.

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A man walks into a vagina. The man, expecting a holiday inn, is very confused, and later gets mauled by five bears, who mistook his scent for a fish.

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What did Batman tell Robin before he got into the Batmobile? "Hey Robin, get in the Batmobile."

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Oh no my baby is dead. Ha.

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what is 2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2+2-2+2x0 20

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What's green and gets you high? Marijuana.

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what do you throw at a mexican man when he is drowning? his family.

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What's that on my back? Tell me it's your phone ! Its my phone.

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A teenager walked into a bar. A drunk man got angry and beat him to death with a club.

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Knock knock We aren't home Sorry.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

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If your fighting an octopus on mars how many lamps does it take to repair a dog house? Nine because a toaster cannot ride a bicycle.

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How did the man get arested? For doing something leagle.

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a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar they are good friends and enjoy alcoholic beverages.

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Knock Knock! FUUCKKKK OFFFFFFFF

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LeBron in the fourth quarter

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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a man walks into a casino, it's the third time this week and he's contemplating suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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