What doesn't kill you makes you stronger Stand a little taller Doesn't mean I'm lonely when I'm alone What doesn't kill you is a bad attempt on your life.

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Q: Why Did The Family Eat Olive Garden For Dinner A: Because it was a simple way to please everyone but letting them choose their own meal

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Why didn't the woman go to the kitchen? She was kidnapped and forced into sex-slavery

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Humpty dumpty sat on a wall Humpty dumpty ha a great fall Hunpty dumpty's skull was split in two

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Yo mama's fat.

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Two chairs were sitting there. One chair says "Could you pass me that cup?" The other chair says "Oh my God a talking chair!"

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My friend told me to jump right off a cliff That's impossible since this cliff goes left...

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How do you address a gay, jewish, african male? You can't, as addressing a person would imply mailing them. And that would violate their human rights. As well, the cost of shipping a package of that size would be rather prohibitive

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What's green and bounces? An envious kangaroo.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why are Chinese women such bad drivers? Only company executives are fortunate enough to own cars in communist China. Furthermore, women are still in a subordinate class in many Eastern societies.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? the bear got shot

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What is worse then having no dad? Russian dad that hates you a lot and wishes you drawn in vodka.

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Do you want to hear a racist joke? I hate black people...

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my wife came out of the kitchen....

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Q: Why was Luigi sad? A: Because he entered the Twilight Zone.

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how did the man die he didnt

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A woman was strolling around town when she turned into a dark alley. She was cold and scared. Suddenly a ferocious looking man jumped out with a knife. The end.

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What happens when you put Michael Jackson in a room full of little boys? The 3 year-old rotting corpse of Michael Jackson and a room full of traumatized little boys.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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What is white and cannot jump? A refridgerator.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Reclu. Reclu who? Recluse Spider.

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Knock Knock! Come in..

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PEANIS!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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