Why was the jewish boy sad? He had no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had been used as an ingredient in kung pow chicken and was on it's way via delivery boy to the house that had ordered it for a lovely evening meal

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How many fat Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call a muslim in an airplane? Whatever his name may be, though you could, of course, choose not to address him, though if it were a two-seater plane, it would be good manners to exchange polite conversation.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

thumb_up thumb_down +32

What do you call a baby in a blender? Child abuse.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why does mexico not have an Olympic team? They do

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What did the ant say when he walked in the club. . . Nothing he was immediately stepped on.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Michael Jackson walks into a daycare center.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Have you ever had Ethiopian food?

thumb_up thumb_down +30

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Knock, knock. Who's there? Bailiffs.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

How do you make a tissue dance? Blow a little boogie in it!

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What is big white and will kill you if it falls out of a tree in winter A refrigerator

thumb_up thumb_down +28

A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What did the black man say about Linkin Park? That there's obviously a rapist in their midst and they should all be questioned.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops