What is Corey Jacobs favorite kind of sandwich? Big Jumbo Kahona Burger!

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One day a terribly epileptic child is put on on a strict Atkins diet by his loving mother. A week later he finds that the frequency and intensity of his seizures have been reduced by its ketogenic effects, which provides exogenous fats for the body to burn, but limits the available carbohydrate so that ketone bodies build up. It is the high level of these ketones which appear to suppress seizures.

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there are two muffins in an oven. one says "its getting hot in here". the other says " oh my gosh!!! its a talking muffin!!!"

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Why did the Mexican cross the road? The light was green.

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What do you get when you hit a deer? A dead deer, which you should probably take home to eat - wouldn't want it to go to waste.

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Q. What did the black lawyer say to the rabbi? A. We're both highly educated professionals.

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What do you do when a blonde falls up an elevator? Pray, and hope Jesus will take you as well. Just kidding, Jesus isn't real.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. So is my eye. I get abused.

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You come across a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. Why are you telling a joke? Go make sex.

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roses are red, violets are blue, i have Alzheimer's, CHEESE ON TOAST

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What is worse than getting raped? Getting raped twice.

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Stephen Hawking walks into a bar. Apparently he can walk now.

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my hand is a DOLPHIN!

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What is brown and woody? Brown wood.

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A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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Did you hear about the man who swam to the bottom of the ocean? He drowned

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Why couldn't the man open his car door for the women? He drove a jeep with removable doors

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You know it's sunny outside when you go outside and its sunny

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Why did the boy punch a little kid in the face? Because he was a bully and liked to feel superior.

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Your mom is so stupid that she didn't get into college due to her low act score of 16. She feels the need to improve so she asked me to tutor her.

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What did the cop say to the man arrested for speeding? You were going over the speed limit sir, I'm going to have to give you a ticket for that.

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Roses are red violets are ponies I dont know what to say mircowave

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What did Britney Spears say when she got to Paris? "Oh my God, we're in France!"

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What's the best thing about The Pixies? Their music.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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