A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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roses are red violets are blue pornhubs down your mums facebook will do.

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What is fat and ginger? No...Not Garfield...Rebeka Tims

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Why did the blind boy cross the road? Why? The world may never know. He was hit by a bus

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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How many anti-jokes does it take to change a light bulb? Since anti-jokes are not concrete objects, any change would have to occur metaphorically or abstractly. The number of anti-jokes required would then be irrelevant.

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an indian woman works at seven eleven. this is because her son has one leg and she needs to pay pay for all the medical needs.

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Why aren't anti jokes funny? Idk. Watermelon in your pants, you're adopted.

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If quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? Worth more points.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. A family is tied-up and screaming for help in my basement.

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your mom is so fat jesus couldnt even lift her spirits

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What did the dog say to the cat? I don't know actually

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That's what SHE said!

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There's two Cherys in a bath one chery asks the other one to pass the soap the other chery said what do I look like, a typewriter?

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yo mamma is so fat when people look at her they say "you're fat"

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Guy finds lamp in the desert and rubs it three times. No genie appears because there's no such thing as magic.

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A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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How did a baby get across the street? Stapled to a chicken.

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A pirate walks into a bar with a steering wheel on his crotch... The bartender calls the police as the man is arrested as piracy an act of robbery or criminal violence.

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horses are burgers now ive got the flu watch out tescos because im gonna sue

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

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Whats orange and sounds like a parrot? a carrot

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What did Chuck Norris say when he stubbed his toe? "Oh shit I stubbed my toe."

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Women's Rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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