yomamas so fat it made Ben kanobi say thats no moon thats yo mama!

how did the fat man get up the stairs he walked

In Soviet Russia, Stalin kills you

an emo kid walks into mcdonalds and orders a happy meal

What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

Q: What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? A: Being caught by the store manager, arrested, convicted, and thrown into jail for petty theft and then getting anally raped for the next 3 months all because you wanted to check an apple without paying for it.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a grizzly bear in your apple

What's pink and when you press a button it turns red? A baby in a blender. What's pink and when you hit it against the wall sounds metallic? A baby with two forks stuck in its eyes.

You are in a sealed room with Joseph Stalin, Osama bin Laden, and Hitler and have a revolver with two bullets. Who do you shoot? None of them. You awkwardly set the gun down and wonder how to get out of this room filled with three corpses.

I scream. You scream. We all scream. Because there is a rapist in the room.

What do a tree and a boy have in common? They both cry when you hit them with an axe... except the tree.

What did one socially awkward kid say to another socially awkward kid? Nothing

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

Why did the muslim cross the road? To get to the other Saiid.

Why was the boy sad? Because his family was raped and stripped of their possessions

A zen master walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." The vendor says, "Sorry, we're out of relish." Then the zen master tells him, "Sir, I don't think you get the joke. As you can see by my long silk robes and fu manchu, I am clearly a zen master. And I have used a pun that would make you think I were asking for enlightenment from a hot dog." The vendor then says, "We don't take too kindly to wise guys here." And then the prick gets up and tosses me into the street!

Why did the dog in Detroit die in the street? It was stabbed.

Sorry babe, even if I was I would not tell you, the entire place is surrounded, but within enough of a distance, so we will plant a nice setup around the green shack so everyone assumes his deal was some solo operation, if someone else is heading at his direction now, you are gonna get busted, so you better stay down.

First joke of the most-disliked area; 9/11 joke. First joke of the most popular area; Holocaust joke. "You shouldn't joke about 9/11 you sick bastard people died" -Said all Americans ever.

A man walks into a bar,gets a drink, and then leaves.

Knock knock Who's there? You're adopted.

A gay man walks out of his bedroom, rubbing his ass in pain. He says, "I hate it when I slip and fall in the shower."

why did the donkey kick the men bc he tryed to pen the tail on hes ass

what gets louder as it gets smaller? a baby in a trash compacter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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