Why did the bus driver lose his family in a car accident? Bc the little boy was seeking revenge

Why don't dinosaurs talk anymore? Because they're all dead, duh. :P

Q: What did the peanut say to the shell? A: Its dark in here.

Q. If the early bird gets the worm, what does the early worm get? A. Eaten...

What worse that punching a baby? Stabing one.

Police Officer: Please step out of the car, sir Jimmy: Xbox...

Why didn't the teen girl get to her appointment? A) She woke up late.

A: why did the kid run out of lead B: because his dad broke into his house raped his wife and stoll everything he owned

How do you get a pirate out of your seat? Politely ask him to move for you were there first.

what do Jewish people and pizzas have in common? they enjoy parties

Why was the jewish boy sad? He had no friends.

What do you call a muslim in an airplane? Whatever his name may be, though you could, of course, choose not to address him, though if it were a two-seater plane, it would be good manners to exchange polite conversation.

Q: Why did Little Suzie fall off of the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock! Who's there? Not Little Suzie!

How many fat Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had been used as an ingredient in kung pow chicken and was on it's way via delivery boy to the house that had ordered it for a lovely evening meal

Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

What do you tell someone who says they are contemplating suicide? where to find some cheap cyanide

Last Christmas I gave you my pie but the very next day you put it in your tummay. Now your dead because I poisoned the pie.

What do you call a baby in a blender? Child abuse.

A baby seal walks into a club.

What do a fish, a can of asparagus, a spool of thread, and a car tire have in common? Nothing.

Hey, Batman Yeah? Knock Knock Who's there? Not your parents!

Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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