You know what happened when I kissed a girl? I enjoyed it so immensely that I received an erection.

whats the difference between and clorox wipe and a paper towel? a clorox wipe is wet.

Sometimes an alligator will bring you apples. Sometimes it won't.

Roses are red Violets are red Shit My garden's on fire?

What's the difference between a poodle and a noodle? Scaboodle!

What do you call a dog with no wings? A dog

My grandfather died in a Nazi Death Camp. He fell off a watch tower.

My period is red, Your sauce is white, now pull down your pants and let me do my workout.

What did the woman say when she didn't finish her meal? Can I get a to go box

Why did the turtle cross the road? He was stapled to the chicken.

women's rights

Knock knock. Who's there? Tim. Tim who? Tim Smith.

what do you use to blindfold chinese person? dental floss!!

Jack and Jill went up the hill to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and smashed his head on a jagged rock and screamed in anguish. Jill watched in horror as her brother suffered through the agonizing pain. Jack was rushed to the hospital immediately, but despite the doctors' efforts, he died. Jill mourned the loss of her brother for many years after the incident.

Whay is jerry so bad at parallel parking? He just got a sex change yesterday.

What is green and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you? A pool table.

What happened to the man who bought his son a birthday gift? He eventually was robbed and shot in the face

so i was F***in this guy the other day with my penis.....shit! i mean i was F***in this girl and i jizzed

Why did the boy punch a little kid in the face? Because he was a bully and liked to feel superior.

Why did Sally cross the road? She didn't, she got hit by my car.

Why did the black man fall asleep in the unemployment line? Well, he was dangerously fatigued from having weeped passionately the entire night in the arms of his wife after losing his high-earning job of 20 years and consequently finding out that his only daughter was in a tragic school bus accident.

What is the difference between a baby and a rat? I don't have a rat in a cage

selena gomez & justin beiber go in space. selena says im hotter than the sun. the way she knows this information is that she is near the sun at this time justin beiber has already drifted off in space.

Why won't the carny let the black kid on the carnival ride? He doesn't meet the height requirements

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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