How do you make a black plumber cry? - kill his whole family

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Your mom is so fat, that when she stepped on the scale she was disappointed with the number that appeared.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why is limety snicket a kike pussy? cuz will ferrell shit in his asshole

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A father was driving with his son. The Son asked " have you been in a car accident in the past 10 years"? The father replys " did you know you HAD 4 siblings"?

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do black people get rich? They collect welfare checks.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you kill a jew? In a variety of destructive manners that are illegal and I would hope you would decide against.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q. How do you make time fly? A. It is highly impossible to make time fly for there is 24 hours in a day, 60 minutes in an hour, and 60 seconds in a minute so therefore the time flows how it should and we do not have such power to do it even though many people claim they do when they know they really don't

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What would happen if RAINN Wilson, the actor, married Michael MANN, the director? They'd probably be arrested; 2 men can't get married in California anymore (thanks a lot, Utah)!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

HAHA i just read a joke!!! and i liked it! :D to bad you dont know what page it was on... wanna know?... YOUR..... #1 LALALA

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A black man offers to take a girl home from the nightclub. As they're sitting in the car, she curiously asks him ''So tell me it's true what they say about black man''. The man sighs and explains: ''Well many people think that we stab, shoot and steal things. Another stereotype that is launched at us is that we have large penises. I however do not steal. My penis is also quite small. After this conversation the girl was driven home safely, and was now convinced that stereotypes are lies.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

I forgot my joke about gamblers, but i bet you would have loved it!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

almost as accidental as your spelling im afraid

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you get when you cross a Fish and a Duck? A Dish

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How do you stop a bus ? Put 3 small children in front of it Whats sad about 3 children who died in a bus crash ? They were my kids. How do you know if you're blind ? You run in to a wall

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Priest: "Matt, will you take Senae to be your wife, your partner in life and your one true love? Will you cherish her friendship and love her today, tomorrow and forever? Will you trust and honor her, laugh with her and cry with her? Will you be faithful through good times and bad, in sickness and in health as long as you both shall live?" Matt: No

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Did you hear the one about the HIV positive man that got rear-ended on the highway? The motorist behind him was distracted on his cell phone, and did not hit the breaks in time to stop.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What happens when lady gaga and chris brown jump into the pool at the same exact time. They get wet

thumb_up thumb_down -5

A man walks into a bar in the morning. He is the bartender, and he works there.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you get a blonde out of a tree? Shoot her in the head.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

So heres a scenario. You and your twin brother are Siamese twins. You are straight and your brother is gay. Your bother has a friend come over. You only have one butt....

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Knock, knock ... ... No one answers the door because knocks produce a quieter sound than a doorbell and the residents of the house are upstairs watching a movie.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because She's Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

How do you kill a blonde? Shoot her repeatedly in the face and then slit her throat.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

What's black and white and red all over? A referee eating a red Popsicle on a hot summers day.

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops