Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

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What's clear and wet?? Water (I think)

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my mom texted me telling me that my dog died... then she texted me the letters LOL... i texted back asking wat was funny!? she thought it ment 'lots of love' :p

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How do you get black children to stop jumping on the bed? Tell them it's not allowed and that consequences will ensue if the rules are not followed.

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How do asians chop their food? CHOPSTICKS! Moral: Yeah that one sucked... ON PURPOSE! Now you dont have to feel inferior ALL the time, you feel equal even though you arent! Ill allow you :D

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Why didn't the girl paint her nails white? Because in this society, that would be considered racist.

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Hey! What dhujv hushichk jgdwrggy man? Go home Sally, you're drunk

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Why does a black man have a bicycle? He bought it with his own money.

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Y

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CAOIMHIN JUST BE QUITE

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Whats the same about a Mole and an Eagle? They both live underground, I lied about the Eagle.

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Why'd Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Knock! Knock! Who's there? Not Sally.

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When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she couldn't afford one.

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Laura Pratz... not having a strong urge to tweet everything that happens in her life.

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Henry VIII: I need another wife!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Thomas Wolsey: All right then. How about my nan? Henry VII: I'm dead!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :~D

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Why can't you look at the sun? Because it's 2.00 AM

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How do you stop an oncoming bus? You push a stroller in front of it.

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Why couldn't John play soccer? Because he was arrested for being black.

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What noise annoys a noisy oyster? Hispanics with their loud car stereos.

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when debbie meets downer

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Remember how I made you hypnotically cum by poking your own nose last time? When I told you that hypnotic story about the astrologer and the brain surgeon? So you wet yet? Think about how easy its going to be for me when I take out Mr.Big and slap down your coffee table with it, yeah... Feels cozy down there does it not?

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Q: Why was the boy so sad? A: His parents were just killed in a car wreck, therefore orphaning him and his five brothers and sisters and leaving them with no money, food, or shelter due to lack of steady income and the fact that their house had been foreclosed on.

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Why do cows have hooves instead of feet? Because they lactose!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops