What did the boy with no arms or legs get for Christmas? A scholarship to a prestigious college that he did not deserve.

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Why did the dog get arrested? He didn't the people responsible for causing the dog fight got arrested for animal abuse.

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What was little Timmy's final words? I just want to go home.

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why am i sore i bummed a giraffe

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One day a there was a guy walking down the street. If you thought this was a joke, you're wrong.

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YOU

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why didnt the kid get anything for christmas? santa exploded

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Knock knock (who's there) Orange ( orange who) orange you glad to see

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two penguins are hanging out in Antartica. the one looks to the other an says "man its really cold out" the other quicky waddles away because of the strange alien sound its friend just made

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How many Jews does it take to change a light bulb? One.

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What did one man say to the other? "hi other man"

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How can you tell Santa is racist? He doesn't give Africans presents.

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Where did the boy go after the explosion? Everywhere

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What did Batman say to Robin just before they got in the bat mobile? Robin,get in the bat mobile.

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What do the world and jelly beans have in common? Nothing.

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What city likes baseball the most? New York

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Want to hear a joke? Me too.

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If you have ten apples, and I take away three, then you will only have seven apples left, because ten minus three is seven. On the other hand, if I have a hundred apples, and you take away ninety-six, then I will call the police on you because that is stealing and it is not allowed.

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Your mother is so fat that she once ate an entire peach cobbler in one sitting and chastised herself yet again for her lack of self-control over her eating habits and her need to fill the holes in her self esteem with the short-lived gratification she gains from eating too much of the foods she finds tasty.

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Whats worse than than falling in a puddle on the way to a meeting? Getting shot while your at that meeting.

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Whats red and smells like blue paint? Red paint

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What did the autistic man say to the woman? I have autism

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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how long is a peice of string howeverlong you want to make it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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