How do you put an elephant in a refridgerator? Go to your local zoo with a shotgun, shoot to kill, load elephant in Uhaul, drive home, remove elephant from Uhaul, sharpen your ax, put on mask to pevent excessive blood on face, begin to chop elephant into small chunks, put the chunks into ziplock bags, call a friend to help you move bags into refridgerator, and move bags into refridgerator. Once all the bags are in the refridgerator, dismiss your friend, get in car, and drive to mexico because killing an elephant is not legal and the police will be there soon. Now as for the giraffe...

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What do you call a group of jews hiding in an attic? Well, this sounds very similar to the events during World War II in which Anne Frank and various jewish refugees hid from the Nazis.

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Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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i have a christmas tree.

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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Why cant steve get a job? Because Steve Jobs is DEAD! Moral: And people are all like "you gotta respect the dead", uh... Why not respect people while they are alive? Humanity is so fucking "smart" sometimes ya? Not that your answer matters...

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Think of a number between 2 and 10? 3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197169399375105820974944592307816406286 208998628034825342117067982148086513282306647093844609550582231725359408128481 11745028410270193852110555964462294895493038

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How come the blind black guy couldent read because he is dead

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Why does Nathan Rogers never get any pussy? Because goblins have small dicks

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Q: Why was the blonde disappointed with her trip to England? A: She found out Big Ben was only a clock

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Why did the black person sit in the back of bus? All the other seats were taken.

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What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town? Look, here comes Tarzan! What do the villagers say when they see Tarzan swinging into town with sunglasses on? Nothing. They don't recognize him.

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Why was the little boy upset? He was on fire.

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What do you do if your computer breaks: Go on your phone. What do you do if your phone breaks: Go on you iPod What do you do if your iPod breaks: Then your screwed and you should get a Job and learn not to break things.

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Where did Susie go during the explosion? On her knees to catch it.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

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Whats white and looks like a bunny? a rabbit

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Stephen Hawking wheels into the Center for Theoretical Cosmology.

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What is the difference between a boyscout and a Jew? Boys outs come home from camp.

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What do you do if a goose comes flying towards you? Duck.

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Whats the difference between 10 dead babies and 8 dead babies? 2 dead babies.

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Q: Why couldn't the ginger play soul music ? A: He couldn't hit the right notes

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how many birds did chuck norris kill with one stone? one.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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