Why did Darren Wilson quick scope Michael Brown? Because he was being attacked, racism is wrong

Jenny tried out for the school play. She got a callback the next day. Her father had died.

What did the chicken do before it crossed the road? Looked both ways and then crossed with caution while looking out for oncoming vehicles.

Whatever you do in life, give 100%… unless you’re giving blood.

Like to tell patrick porcupine to stop gaming

What do you call a kid with no arms and an eye patch? Names.

Can apples get viruses? No, they are a fruit, and fruit cannot get viruses.

Q: Why can't a tomato fly a plane? A: Cuz it's a tomato

Why did the girl run to school Because a lion was chasing her

Safe sex MR

yo mamas so fat that when she wears a bathing suit people go "wow, that women is fat"

Q: What is the difference between Jimmy and a kite A: Jimmy is higher MR

What did the doctor say to his patient with cancer? "You have cancer...".

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? An orange parrot.

What did Jesus say to the giraffe? Good day to you sir.

You really need some help in spelling the word GOD... Anyway, none of your fucking business.I am a child for this scenario only so... Moral: LET THAT CHILD ALONE!

Why did the woman fall off her bike? She got hit by a car door

Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

Women's Rights

hi im tom. whats your name? joe. hi im tom. whats your name? joe... tom has short term memory loss.

How do you get your clock to stop ticking? Hit it with a sledge hammer.

Why was the anti joke funny? because it wasn't funny.

'Knock Knock' "Who's there?" 'Nobody. Your schizophrenia has become so bad you can barely make it through a normal day without emotionally collapsing. Your social life has dissolved into a world of fear, and your personal relationships have crumbled away before your eyes. Major depression and anxiety are eating you away. You have nothing left.'

When life throws you knives, you're probably dead

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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