Yo momma's so fat that all the children within a close proximity of your home think that your mother is a very large woman.

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why do black people have dark skin? because they were born that way

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Nickelback

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What did the guy say when he lost his tractor? Wheres my tractor?

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Recycling anti-jokes

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Doctor, Doctor I think your gay. thats because i am

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An alphabet walks into the post office and asks for a letter. What does the postal worker give the alphabet? Nothing. Alphabets can't walk.

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Two men walked into a bar. I'm surprised the second man did not duck out of the way.

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What made Chuck Norris cry? Stubbing his toe

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Q: What has two legs and is bloody? A: half a cat

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richard is fag

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Why are there clocks on stoves? Because it is a convenient way to tell the time.

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What happens, when you give a blonde a Computer? She uses it like any other person because her haircolor has nothing to do with her Intelligence

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why did the little girl drown? because she was left unsupervized and had never properly learned to swim. she also had no arms and cancer.

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This guys grandma comes to live with him. While shes there she has a stroke. He rushes her to the hospital and waits for her to come out of surgery. The doctor comes out and says "i got good news and bad news" The guy says " give me the bad news" the doctor says "your grandma has had a massive stroke and wont be able to go to the bathroom by herself or eat by herself, so you'll have to feed her baby food and change her Diaper for the rest of her life." So then the guy goes " well crap whats the good news" The doctor goes "Ahh im just kidding she died"

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What did Santa call the prostitute? Nothing. Santa isn't real.

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How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

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Why wasn't the TV remote working? It was out of batteries.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm an expert on flowers.

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Whats black and has white cream in it? Oreos

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What's the difference between chili and a urologist? One is hot and spicy and the other analyzes urine.

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What's white, wet, and sticky? A tissue that I just blew my nose with.

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Do you love me? No.

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Why was the blonde girl stupid? She had suffered sever brain damage the previous month and was still recovering.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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