Ask me if I'm Abraham Lincoln. Are you Abraham Lincoln? No.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Charcoal is black So is my neighbor

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game"

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Why was the boy hanging from the ceiling? He was sad

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How did you know it was bedtime at Michael Jackson's house? When his clock's big hand met the little hand, usually at 10 or 11, though sometimes later if he had a concert that night.

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What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage.

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Why did the Middle east send Doris a camel's penis? Because Uncle Monty's head was damn tasty

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My parents died!

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obama

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Santa isn't real.

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Why was the woman riding a camel? Because woman aren't allowed to drive in her country therefore she rides a camel as a way to commute. The camel's name is Gregory.

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What is red, blue, green, and pink, tie died, and alive? Nothing.

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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Why was the man sad? His wife left

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like saying the colors of flowers... how about you.

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What ended my last relationship? Oncoming traffic.

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8

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What did catwoman say to batman? meow.

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when life knocks you down you don't do anything because life is a mental concept that does not have the ability to knock you down since it doesn't have a physical bodie

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Why did the duck eat the chicken noodle soup? The duck was told that if he ate the chicken noodle soup on Fear Factor he would win $10,000. What he failed to realize was that he forgot to sign page 16 on the episode contract and did not win any money and was sued by Campbell's soup for copyright infringement.

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Why did the pervert cross the road? His dick was stuck in the chicken

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A priest a rabbi and a minister are all standing at the gates of heaven. Us mortal beings can only conjecture what might've have taken place.

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Shoot her in the head

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After visiting the dentist, Ke$ha had sixteen cavities because brushing your teeth with bottles of jack causes plaque to build up.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops