a woman leaves the kitchen.......

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What's the best thing about The Pixies? Their music.

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Why does Sally sell sea shells down by the sea shore? To support her growing crack addiction that is ruining Sally's and Sally's families lives

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Why is it so bad that the bus fell off the cliff? All my friends were on it.

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"Sh*t!" cursed the man. "You're such a potty mouth!" replied the unamused toilet.

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What did the blond do on October 12th? Get hit by a bus

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Two muffins are baking in an oven. What does one say to the other? Nothing. They are both inanimate objects and can't speak.

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What is blue and smells like the sea The ocean

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A tree falls in the woods. A deaf boy, who had been frolicking through the forest, is struck down by the tree. He dies. His parents are ridden with grief for years, until finally the father commits suicide. The mother soon remarried and had two more children. Both died before the age of 15. She was a horrible mother.

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How did the boyfriend react when the girlfriend told him she was pregnant? Nothing.. He already changed his number and packed up his things and moved out of the state

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game"

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What do you get if you give a black man more than 5 watermelons? Jeff the Killer.

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what do u call a black person by his name

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Whats better than ten dead babys in one trashcan??? One dead baby in ten trashcans.

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Why did the chicken cross the street? Because the light was red and cars had stopped.

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Where did Susie go during the bombing? Everywhere. - Blake Woodman

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If an old person falls in the middle of the woods do they make a sound? No their died.

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Hellen Keller walks into a bar. And a tree. And a lamp.

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How do you kill half the Mexican population? through a penny of a cliff. How do you kill the other half? Tell them its still down there.

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Q: how do u wake lady gaga up? A: you poke-poke poke her face.

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When I grow up, I don't want to be a therapist. I have enough trouble figuring out the problems in my math book.

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when life knocks you down you don't do anything because life is a mental concept that does not have the ability to knock you down since it doesn't have a physical bodie

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I hate it when people talk about concentration camps... my grandad died in one He fell off the guard tower

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How do you kill a blonde woman? Shoot her in the head

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops