Hey I just met you you are a sneaker smell my gym socks and then pick oot throughyour nose

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never bring a knife to a gun fight. bring a sword.

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knoc knock! who's there? poo on! poo on who? you!

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Why did Jimmy get off of the park bench? he wanted candy from the man in the white van

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Q: What did the teacher say at the end of recess. A: "Recess is over."

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What the last thing that went through Osama's mind? A bullet

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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What do you do if you work in subway? we make the subs put meat on it then put salad on then cut it then wrap it other duites involved but cba to exsplain

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Help I'm being raped!

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What did the fat guy say after his weight-reduction surgery? I'm gonna sue the clown pants out of McDonalds

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Hitler, a Nazi, and a Jew walk into a bar. Only Hitler and the Nazi walk out. What happened to the Jew? He had to use the bathroom so he asked Hitler and his Nazi friend to wait in the car.

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CORRECTION TO THE COMMENT BELOW! Its a WIN/WIN/WIN/WINWINWINWINWINWIN (WIN For at least 30 more minutes)/CUUUUM!/"SORE ASS WHINING CHILD Gonna grow into a slut SITUATION!" friendly r*pist neighbourhood Moral Man The Anti-Christ: Do not thumb me down unless you want to feel the big burning hot spear of darkness, and you do not... You better don`t be or become a sore ass kid you allshole if you know what I am saying... Yeah! Thats right! You better fear me! Because the angrier you look... The more offended you become... The better you are starting to look...

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What is a chair?

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Q: If you are running a race and a fridge hits you, how many dogs play x-box in the snow? A: 12 orange waffles

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Yo momma so ugly just after she was born, her mother said, "What a treasure!" and her father said, "Yea, let's go bury it!"

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What time is it? I just looked at my clock on the wall. It is 9:14 AM Eastern Standard Time.

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Where was little suzie the day after the house fire? At the hospital, being treated for minor burns.

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A black man and a mexican are falling off a cliff. Who lands first? The police officer.

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What's worse than dropping your ice cream? The Holocaust

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How do you beat a black man in a race? You run faster then him.

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Did you hear about the guy in town living in a tyre, he got a puncture now hes living in a flat.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. A family is tied-up and screaming for help in my basement.

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Why did the women die? Because She was a Squirrel.

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Your momma's so fat: she now considers her body to be a metaphor for post-industrial excess.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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