Why wasn't the dog obedient? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a person with a big ass head? A person with a big ass head

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The Awkward moment when the world doesn't end

thumb_up thumb_down +5

yo momma is so fat that she got diabetes and lost her legs

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did little timmy cry? He was nailed to a ceiling fan.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What did one muffin say to the other muffin? A: "AAAA! A TALKING MUFFIN!"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats worse than a dog biting you? Cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How to you scare a paraplegic? Point a gun at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

what did the doctor say to the guy with a bullet in his arm you have a bullet in your arm

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A duck walks into a bar.... Duck: Can I have a glass of water? Bartender: How would you like to pay for it? Duck: Put it on my bill

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why was the fat guy sad? his daughter is slowly dying of anorexia why was the fat guy sad? his daughter was raped by a giant panda bear

thumb_up thumb_down +3

A. Do you know the best part about Anti Jokes? B. No

thumb_up thumb_down +3

"I never want to see you again!" shouted Stevie Wonder to the genie in the bottle, as a young boy.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did Sally get for chirstmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +3

why was the boy crying he had cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +3

*Phone rings* Hello? Hi, is your refrigerator running? No, it actually broke down yesterday. Are you the repair man? Yes, the repairs will cost $400

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the black guy eat KFC? Cause he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Two nuns are in a bathtub, one nun turns to the other and says "where's the soap". The other nun replies "it does, doesn't it".

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Where was I born? Pakistan. You?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Caroline Kelly.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What did the man do after he got in his car with out his keys? He started it up and drove Away

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So Helen Keller walked into a bar... and then a chair.... and then a table..

thumb_up thumb_down +3

So, a man walks into a bar, and he ends up in intensive care, because the bar was very hot and gave him severe burns. He was on business in an industrial park.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops