How do you get a black man out of a tree? You provide him with a ladder of varying length depending on his height in the tree and hold the ladder to ensure that it is stable and safe while he is climbing down. If he his very high in the tree then it may be helpful to call the fire department for assistance in getting him down.

Where did Susie go when the bomb went of? Everywhere?

knock knock who's there... you you who who the fuck are you

A girlfriend told her boyfriend it soaked all the way through. She screwed up their art project.

Why was Billy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

Why did Suzy fall off the swing? She was a donut.

Whats worse than pulling down a girls pants and seeing a giant furry bush... finding out her vagina has teeth in it.

When life gives you lemons.... Impossible life is not a person nor a dispenser of lemons.

What's worse than a spilled ice cream cone? 2 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 2 spilled ice cream cones? 3 spilled ice cream cones. What's worse than 3 spilled ice cream cones? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? 4 spilled ice cream cones.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, come at me again and I'll punch you

what's the difference between 7 and 2? 5

What's funnier than the Holocaust? HA!

I hated hipsters before hating hipsters was mainstream. Does that make it sound like I have a fixed gear bicycle? Because I don't... I promise... What's a fixed gear bicycle, you ask? You mean you don't know???

why did the kid fall down the stairs? he had polio

Your mamas so old she died of old age, R.I.P.

Q: What did the Jewish man find when he turned on his shower? A: gas

How many Frenchmen does it take to surrender? Probably just one.

Q: what is blue and floats in a pool? A: a baby Q: what is purple and at the bottom of the pool? A: the baby 5 minutes later

A man crashed his boat and is lost in the ocean. He comes across a cruise ship, and they ask if he wants help. The man says, "No. God will save me, but thanks anyway." Later on that night, he is eaten by a shark.

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple. finding two worms in your apple. and being an orphan.

What did Mars say to warn Prehistoric Earth before an asteroid hit it? Nothing, sound can't travel through space, it's a vacuum. The dinosaurs will be missed.

What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

what's worse than the holocaust? when starbucks puts whip cream in my hot chocolate and I didn't ask for it. created by KA

Why did the boy loose his hat Because he got hit by a plane

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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