Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens don't have the cognitive capacity to reason. So you'd never know

so you're waling through the desert and a tire falls off your canoe. How many pancakes does it take to shingle a doghouse?

Knock-knock. Who's there? Doorbell repairman. ym

your brother so fine that hes skinney

a man walks in to a night club he can not danse so he just wachis pepol

I have a knock knock joke. You go first.

You know what me and Bill Cosby have in common? Katie..

what has small feet? a human being with a tiny proximity of feet matter.

Why did the chicken cross the road? So he could walk into the mall and kill hundreds of innocent lives and leave thousands wounded.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms or legs.

Roses are Red You're Black and Blue My fists seemed to have taken A liking to you

What's more depressing than watching a worm watching to worms

What do you get when you cross a leopard with a camel? Sacked from the zoo.

How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Blond answers: Whaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaat............?

How are humans like slinkies? - They are not good for very much and bring a smile to your face when pushed down the stairs!

In Soviet Russia You drive car, because a car driving you would be screwed up

Make a man a fire and he'll be warm for a day... set a man on fire and he'll be warm for the rest of his life.

What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

a little boy takes his lacrosse stick to his mom and says "hey mom this is bob" the mom says "hi bob" and she says to her son "does bob say hi back?" and the boy says "no mom. hes a lacrosse stick."

Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He looks it up first to make sure he's got it right before dialing.

There was 3 guys. A mexican, a black guy, and a jew. They work at a construction site and one day they found what appears to be a magic lamp. The mexican guy rubs the lamp hoping for a genie to appear and grant them wishes. Sure enough a genie appears. "I have been freed from the magic lamp." Says the genie "I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The mexican guy did not understand english. The jew steals the lamp and the black guy stabs him. The next day a blonde goes to the crime scene. He spot the magic lamp on the floor, picks it up, and rubs it. The genie appears. "I have been freed from the lamp. I shall grant one wish and one wish only to whoever rubbed the magic lamp." The blonde says "I wish Jose could speak ad understand english." Suddenly, the mexican appears and says "Thank you."

Knock knock! who's there? Excuse me sir can I have a moment to talk to you about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

What's black and white and red all over? An interracial couple that has just been brutally murdered. If you see this, you should probably notify the local police so that they may investigate the situiation.

How Many Blondes does it take to open a fridge. 1 Because most blondes are smart and can open fridges.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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