What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

Is your Alzheimers getting better? I have alzeimers?...

Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

Q: What did the boy with no arms and legs get for Chrismas? A: Cancer

Did you hear about the kidnapping in Pennsylvania? He woke up...

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* Knock Knock. *Silence* *Busts open door* "Oh right... I killed Bob last week.

Friends are a lot like trees... ...they fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

This is not a joke or is it

Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

What's red and curly and goes 100km an hour? Palfi in a blender

Why didn't the hispanic muslim woman vote for Donald Trump in the 2016 primaries? Because she lives in Connecticut where the primaries have not yet taken place.

Q: what is socialism? A: a terrible system

What do accountants do when they're constipated? Take a laxative and eat plenty of fiber.

what has two legs and is red all over? half a cat

what happend to the kid standing on a railway, he got hit by a train

A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter anyway because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, There are so many different endings to this, it makes me just wanna Shoot Myself!

There are 2 women at a bus stop. One of them has a swollen belly. The pregnant woman says to the other one, "I'm expecting a baby." The other woman responds, "That's too bad. I'm expecting a bus, at least that'll help me."

what does hi = good by cause person doesn't like you.

How do you confuse a blonde? The same way you confuse a brunette or redhead, hair color has nothing to do with an individual's intelligence.

how do you wake up lady gaga? you set her alarm for the intended time

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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