Whats long hard and has seaman? A submarine!

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Your Mommy is a gas pump.

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Knock knock! Who's there? The police your son died in a car crash.

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Why doesn't God answer prayers? God does answer prayers, but He does not want you to have everything you want just by asking it, He wants you to work for what you have, everything happens for a reason. ... Nah, it's because God does not exist.

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Q: How Do You Stop a Bus? A: Pull the Brakes so it comes to a absolute stop.

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the movie? Because he was armed and clearly inebriated.

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Why did the man break all his bones? Because his parachute failed to open

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fuck you you punkass piece of shit I hope you burn in my uncle's titties and ass rape yourself while screaming "make it stop!'. Then, I hope that you take a titanic needle and shove it up your lower kidney until it tears open and all your bodily fluids spill out into an ocean of shit. Also, I have 73 balls with a ballsack for each ball. So, I have 73 ballsacks.

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why was ej's penis hard? because he had just got done having fine exquisit sex which he had ejaculated with a sturn body builder name frank who he had been seeing for the past few months.

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A ninja walked into a dojo and was kindly greeted by his master.

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Why is an elephant gray Because it's GRAY!!! duh

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How many licks does it take to get to the tootsie roll center of a tootsie pop? ...hey, it's kinda fun to type tootsie... ...tootsie tootsie tootsie...

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Steve, what do I write on a 3946 if more than two vehicles were involved?

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Q: How do you know your gay? A: When you have unexpected desires for men, which is a sin to a religion, so the choice of being gay is against the bible and you would soon be sent to the pit of fire we call hell.

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What did the friend say to the other friend? A. Hi friend.

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What did the doctor say to his wife? We have grown apart over the years, I want a divorce.

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How do you confuse Hellen Keller? You do not, as she is blind and deaf, and partaking in doing so would be the morally wrong thing to do.

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brock has small hands for a small job

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Why is the sky blue? Because bicycles have two tires

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42

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Hey, did you guys hear what happened the Steve Jobs? He died.

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The last time I heard that joke, I fell off my pet single celled bacteria.

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Why was the little boy late to school Cause he walked on a landmine

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A white man a black man a french man and a mexican are on a sinking ship. The French man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of begets over board. The Black man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of red hot cheetos overboard The Mexican man says "we have too many of these" and throws a bunch of Tacos over board. And then the White man says "we have too many of these" and throws the Mexican man overboard

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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