What did the rapist say before the little girl got in the van? Get in the van

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a black and a mexican are walking down the street, two cops look up to see this and immediately say "shit, this can't be good".

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A lawyer gets admitted to a bar.

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Knock Knock Nobody answered because the people in the house were away.

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Why did god smite the homosex man with all of heavens wrath? For shits and gigs.

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Where do you send a Jew with ADD? A concentration camp.

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No, we are all different, none of us are the same, you however, have no match, your ability to think influence and inspire even today, is unmatched. It is he who is unmatched, who stands alone.

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Knock Knock. -Who's there ? It's me. -Come in.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because a tree fell on her. Knock Knock Who's There? Not Sally...

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Roses are red, Sometimes they're white. Or pink. Or yellow. There are roses of many colors.

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What do you call a deer with no eyes? The victim of a freak genetic mutation and extremely susceptible to predators, meaning it will live a short life in the wilderness.

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what is a bike without wheels? not a bike.

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Q: Why did the lady retire? A: Because she had been working for numerous years and felt that she needed to spend more time with her family.

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Why was the orange so serious? He was trying to concentrate.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No Neither has he

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Roses are grey, Violets are grey, Im a dog. RUUUFFF!

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how do you know if your friend is your best friend? if he cries you cry, if he laughs you laughs, if he jumps out a window you laugh again.

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What's the difference between you and yourself? Yourself has 4 more letter in it.

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how do you make a door cry? twist its nob

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Why does Reid always have a blank stare on his face? Because he is constantly searching for the answer as to why his sister was raped, stabbed, and burned alive all right in front of his face.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? 6 is a homophobe and 7 is a little fruity.

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Yo mama is so poor I saw her kicking a can down the street and asked her what she was doing? Her reply was: Kicking a can down the street. What did you think she was doing? Moving?

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How did you feel after smoking that joint? I felt like going to pass out And then? I passed out

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your mother is so rather large that when she stepped onto a scale, it stated her exact body weight which was 280 pounds. Which come to think of it isn't that big considering that obesity is now the norm and average people are referred to as abnormal.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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