Why couldn't little Susie ride her bicycle? She had Cerebral Palsy.

Mr.Green walks into the class. He is alone with no wife and no kids and suffers from depression. His salary is below average and he can't pay the rent this week so he'll probably get evicted. He has aids. He will die in 2 weeks.

Parent: Please, my son have sinned. Please cleanse him from his sins. Priest: Hmmm, it may be hard to cleanse him from his demons. You may leave him in my car today. We shall enter the dark chambers where we will battle your demons Parent: Thankyou Priest: Alone, in the dark. It will be painful for him, but he shall be cleansed *wink* Parent: whut?

Man walks into Malaysian Airlines "Hey, can I have the next flight to--" "This is our only policy! You pay the fare we pick the where."

Do you know what kind of world I dream of? Until you tell me, no I don't. How could I? I'm not telepathic, after all.

Doctor, my husband tells me he doesn't like my figure .... That's irrelevant now, you've contracted a rare blood disease and will be dead within a month.

- My grand mother died. - I'm sorry.... Did She died of old age ? - No, she got eaten by a giant worm.

Q: Why is there a crack in the liberty bell? A:Because someone droped it and it broke

Whats worse than losing The Game? The Holocaust

Why did the little boy cry? I cut off his toes one by one and shoved fireworks up his ass

Tyler is a downer and is always negative to everybody

Rudolf the rednosed reindeer died today. He was reported flying over Madrid when he was hit by a jumbo jet and a flock of seagulls. People are now saying that the reindeer in Spain was hit mainly by the plane.

An American almost walks into a store when he sees a Jew. The Jew was also about to walk into the store, So the american opens the door for him and says"Jew first."

Mitt Romney

What's black, white and red all over? A nun that fell down a flight of stairs

How do you fit 4 homosexuals onto a barstool? You make the barstool wider allowing for all the men to sit more comfortably on top of the stool.

Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? To get to the other side.

A horse walked into a bar and asked for a pint. The barman said, 'Sorry, we don't serve horses.' Adele sighed and walked out.

Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

Why can't Jimmy talk? He's dead.

Why was the deer afraid of the hunter because the smell of toasters

Why is Obama the Antichrist? Salad.

HEY YOU! TISSUE!

Why did the girl scream? Someone shot her mom

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...