Turn your Caps Lock off, people think you're yelling at them, Stephen Hawking.

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What is black and white and red all over? Zebra domestic violence isn't funny.

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What would you call the fatty cranial mass surrounding a malignant tumor? Ted Kennedy's Head.

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Two tomatoes walk across the street and manage to get over safely. COME ON MUSTARD!

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Who's obsessed with death and love to make jokes about it? The majority of the contributors in this site.

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WHAT HAS MAN BOOBS THE SIXE OF JUPITER BOMBER NEVILLE

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Hillary Clinton

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how hight is a china man ? derr his name is how high and he is a china man

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How do you kill an elephant? -With a gun? No, an elephant gun. How do you kill a red elephant? -With an elephant gun? No, with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a blue elephant? -WIth a blue elephant gun? No, you choke it until it turns blue and kill it with a red elephant gun. How do you kill a purple elephant? Theres no such thing as a purple elephant, thus contradicting the reality of performing a major act of animal abuse on it.

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Why was a small girl found dead in the town park? Because Sallie was a bitch and deserved to die.

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Your mom is so fat that she has type 2 diabetes.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Cindy Cindy who? Cindy your neighbor. I was wondering if I could borrow some milk, I ran out.

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What did the mexican say to the black guy? He asked if he needed some drugs. Why? He was a pharmacist.

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Tod:Hey Rick wanna hear a joke?Rick:No.

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Who is green? Mike Wazowsky.

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What did the blind and deaf kid get for Christmas? Leukemia.

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knock knock "whos there ?" "the police , your husband has died" "ok"

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Goldilocks walks into a bar. But its not really a bar, it's a bear cave and she is eaten by porridge eating bears.

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What's white and gluey Glue

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The horses name was Friday.

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What's sad about a dead person? He was my friend.

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Would you believe me if i said... ^^^^ You read that line wrong?

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What is the same between a turtle and an eagle? They both fly, apart from the turtle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops