Why couldnt the boy poop? Because he was staring right in his eye.

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A Penguin walks in to a bar. then he walks out.

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Never bring a knife to a sword fight Bring A GIANT FREAKING HIPPOPOTAMUS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Vicky is my best friend.

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What is the difference between a cow and a human? A lot of things.

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What did the man say to the woman with two black eyes? "Oh my goodness! Are you alright?!"

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Generator? One powers your house...and then there's the generator.

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Why did the girl scream for help? She was being raped.

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kieran scott has a huge back

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Why did the frog commute suicide ? Because His mother was a type writer

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Is your refrigerator running? No. That is highly improbable because a refrigerator has no arms or legs, also a refrigerator is not a human being, or alive in any manor and therefor cannot be moved with out an external force acted upon it.

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pauls tuck

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im at school

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EAT YOUR DINNER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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why do jews have such big noses? A: it has been inherited through many generations

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If you were expecting an antijoke you have come to the wrong place however here is a good recipe for a cake: Ingredients 2-1/2 cups 2% milk 1 cup butter, cubed 8 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped 3 eggs 2 teaspoons vanilla extract 2-2/3 cups all-purpose flour 2 cups sugar 1 teaspoon baking soda 1/2 teaspoon salt FILLING: 6 tablespoons butter, cubed 4 ounces bittersweet chocolate, chopped 2-1/2 cups confectioners' sugar 1/2 cup heavy whipping cream GANACHE: 10 ounces semisweet chocolate, chopped 2/3 cup heavy whipping cream Directions In a large saucepan, cook the milk, butter and chocolate over low heat until melted. Remove from the heat; let stand for 10 minutes. Preheat oven to 325°. In a large bowl, beat eggs and vanilla; stir in chocolate mixture until smooth. Combine the flour, sugar, baking soda and salt; gradually add to chocolate mixture and mix well (batter will be thin). Transfer to three greased and floured 9-in. round baking pans. Bake 25-30 minutes or until a toothpick inserted in center comes out clean. Cool 10 minutes before removing from pans to wire racks to cool completely. For filling, in a small saucepan, melt butter and chocolate. Stir in confectioners' sugar and cream until smooth. For ganache, place chocolate in a small bowl. In a small saucepan, bring cream just to a boil. Pour over chocolate; whisk until smooth. Cool, stirring occasionally, until ganache reaches a spreading consistency. Place one cake layer on a serving plate; spread with half of the filling. Repeat layers. Top with remaining cake layer. Spread ganache over top and sides of cake. Store in the refrigerator. Yield: 16 servings.

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once you go black you prefer not to date any white people

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Your momma's so fat; She has a constant sense of insecurity due to the instability in her relationships caused by her involuntary obesity.

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What's red, hairy, and squishy? Helen Keller in a blender.

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Guy at computer: My computer won't turn on. Help desk Guy: Did you try restarting. Guy at computer: No. The help desk guy hangs up and the guy at the computer proceeds to cry because he has failed.

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Q. Where do you find Indonesia A. On a map

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A black van approaches a small boy. The boy gets in the van, and the van drives away.

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What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

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Knock knock Who's there? A robber Oh

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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