- Anti Joke

Boyfriend: Why are you so negative all the time? Girlfriend: I'm not! I'm positive! Boyfriend: No your not your arguing with me right now and you... Narrator: The girl takes the pregnancy test and shoves it in the guys mouth kicks him in the nuts and runs out the door.

-7

What do you call a bunch of black people buried up to their hair? Afro turf

-7

when there's trouble lurking in your neighbourhood, who you gonna call? The local authorities.

-7

Why did the Jew rob the bank? -He was a criminal.

-7

What is similar about a goose and newly weds? They both aren't chairs

-7

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it's goal was to get to the other side however unfortunately a giant gorilla picked up a car; threw it at a nearby building causing it to collapse; setting off a massive explosion causing all of the buildings on that side of the street to collapse. As the whole other side of the street was covered in rubble making it impossible for the chicken to get to the other side, so the chicken decided to turn around and go home.

-7

Roses are red Violets are blue Flesh is green When the dead start to rise you're on my team

-7

There's a Christian preist, Jesus, and a Jewish rabi on a boat. They want to go fishing, but they forgot the sunscreen, the bait, and the fishing line. The Christian preist walks across the water and goes and gets the Sunscreen. Jesus walks across the water and gets the bait. The Jewish rabi steps out of the boat and drowns. Jesus turns to the Priest and says, "Do you suppose we should have told about the underwater bridge?"

-9

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

Want more? You might be interested in...

Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

There was a big guy he was called Mac. So Mc Donalds turned him into a burger

How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? ...get back in the kitchen, I'm hungry

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because there was no oncoming traffic.

The girl was really drunk and passed out. She woke up the next day with a hangover.

Why did the priest kill his family? Preists can't marry, therefore have not families.

why can't the bat see? Because it's made of metal

How do you help someone stop drowning You take your foot off the back their head.

AWWWWWW YEEESSSS!!!

What is the difference between Madeleine McCan and a toaster? A toaster wasn't raped and murdered.

The only time when white and black are together When I've just taken a shit! ?ttis

Whats the difference between a lamp and Morgan Freeman? Alot

Women's Professional _________

so a blind man walks into a bar, then a chair, then a table.

have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No. Neither has he....

A cat ran into the road...I hit it

A black man shoots someone. He was a cop and he killed a dangerous man who attacked him.